In a few hours time, I'll be in Langkawi. It will be Izzati's first flight and our 2nd trip there after our honeymoon. She's barely past 1 and she's already flying. I was 16 before I first flew in an airplane to Jakarta. Boy, was I excited back then.
The last time we were there, we had quite a good time but didn't really know how to spend our time meaningfully. We didn't do much planning ahead and did things on the fly. Now, we are much better prepared for the trip and with my parents and sister coming along, it will be easier for us with Izzati in tow.
This is probably my shortest entry as I am leaving in an hours' time. So, au revoir.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Thursday, December 04, 2008
The round that shook us all
The bullet does not have eyes.
Heard that a thousand times but it never really meant much to me. Not until the events of recent days. Yeap, I'm referring to the murder of Ms Lo Hwei Yen in Mumbai - a victim of international terrorism. By now, many, if not all Singaporeans would have read or heard about the incident.
For the longest time, we have all stood by and watched as terror attacks unfolded around the world. World Trade Center, Madrid, London and Bali have all experienced these first-hand and no Singaporean was ever fatally caught in the crossfire. Until now. We can't deny the fact all this while, we feel detached from the realities of such attacks as few of us had experienced it first hand. When I first read the news 2 days ago, my immediate reaction was one of sympathy to the family of the deceased.
I'm not going to tarnish the memories of the innocent deceased such as Ms Lo by saying they deserved it, because they didn't. No one deserved it. No one deserves to spend their last moments staring down the barrel of an AK-47 alone and terrified, away from loved ones. No one deserves to go without the chance for a proper goodbye. As I read the papers these past few days, I felt the grief felt by those left behind - directly feeling the repercussions of that shot. When I saw the husband's press conference, my heart went out to him - I felt his pain. As deep as his grief, there are still many more who are worse off than him in this aftermath.
I can't fathom how the 10 attackers went ahead with their plan. Dismissing any notion of humanity, bereft of any sense of remorse and devoid of any compassion, they went into Mumbai to face their destiny - one which is misguided by the carrots dangled before them. Jihad was the buzz word. It was their way of justifying the murder of hundreds. The words of the Prophet - taken way out of context - was their salvation. But to me, there is no Jihad. Theirs was a political goal from the onset. Hiding behind the cloak that is Islam,they launched the attacks, in the name of Allah - or so they say.
As much as I empathise with the troubles many Muslims around the world face, what with the atrocities committed in Israel, the violation of sovereignty in Afghanistan and Iraq , there can be no justification for such acts of terror. Using the words of the Prophet PBUH, all taken in the wrong context to suit their skewed mentality and crooked political aims, they use jihad as the unifying call to arms for all Muslim to resort to terrorism. Personally, I don't buy that. Oppression? What Oppression? The way I see it, there is no religious justification for attacks on civilian targets no matter what they say.
To me, it's all political. Taleban in Afghanistan, Hamas in Palestine, Abu Sayyaf in Philippines, Lashkar-E-Taiba in Pakistan, JI in SEA and Al-Qaeda everywhere else are not religious entities who are fighting oppression, they are political entities with a greater aim than just jihad. In any case, Jihad doesn't have to be a military struggle. The reality of it is that there is probably nowhere in the world right now where Jihad is really justified.
To those who lost loved ones, I can only send my condolences and only some words of sympathy. For those amongst us who are not directly affected, it's a warning that has really hit home. The question to be asked is probably, would we want to sacrifice the peace and harmony we have here in order to realise our political aims?
Heard that a thousand times but it never really meant much to me. Not until the events of recent days. Yeap, I'm referring to the murder of Ms Lo Hwei Yen in Mumbai - a victim of international terrorism. By now, many, if not all Singaporeans would have read or heard about the incident.
For the longest time, we have all stood by and watched as terror attacks unfolded around the world. World Trade Center, Madrid, London and Bali have all experienced these first-hand and no Singaporean was ever fatally caught in the crossfire. Until now. We can't deny the fact all this while, we feel detached from the realities of such attacks as few of us had experienced it first hand. When I first read the news 2 days ago, my immediate reaction was one of sympathy to the family of the deceased.
I'm not going to tarnish the memories of the innocent deceased such as Ms Lo by saying they deserved it, because they didn't. No one deserved it. No one deserves to spend their last moments staring down the barrel of an AK-47 alone and terrified, away from loved ones. No one deserves to go without the chance for a proper goodbye. As I read the papers these past few days, I felt the grief felt by those left behind - directly feeling the repercussions of that shot. When I saw the husband's press conference, my heart went out to him - I felt his pain. As deep as his grief, there are still many more who are worse off than him in this aftermath.
I can't fathom how the 10 attackers went ahead with their plan. Dismissing any notion of humanity, bereft of any sense of remorse and devoid of any compassion, they went into Mumbai to face their destiny - one which is misguided by the carrots dangled before them. Jihad was the buzz word. It was their way of justifying the murder of hundreds. The words of the Prophet - taken way out of context - was their salvation. But to me, there is no Jihad. Theirs was a political goal from the onset. Hiding behind the cloak that is Islam,they launched the attacks, in the name of Allah - or so they say.
As much as I empathise with the troubles many Muslims around the world face, what with the atrocities committed in Israel, the violation of sovereignty in Afghanistan and Iraq , there can be no justification for such acts of terror. Using the words of the Prophet PBUH, all taken in the wrong context to suit their skewed mentality and crooked political aims, they use jihad as the unifying call to arms for all Muslim to resort to terrorism. Personally, I don't buy that. Oppression? What Oppression? The way I see it, there is no religious justification for attacks on civilian targets no matter what they say.
To me, it's all political. Taleban in Afghanistan, Hamas in Palestine, Abu Sayyaf in Philippines, Lashkar-E-Taiba in Pakistan, JI in SEA and Al-Qaeda everywhere else are not religious entities who are fighting oppression, they are political entities with a greater aim than just jihad. In any case, Jihad doesn't have to be a military struggle. The reality of it is that there is probably nowhere in the world right now where Jihad is really justified.
To those who lost loved ones, I can only send my condolences and only some words of sympathy. For those amongst us who are not directly affected, it's a warning that has really hit home. The question to be asked is probably, would we want to sacrifice the peace and harmony we have here in order to realise our political aims?
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Going toe to toe.....
I guess everyone has read or heard about the guy who went toe to toe with the white tiger and never came back. Why he went into the tiger enclosure in full view of all those visitors and tourists no one may ever know. Speculation abounds on his mental well-being and his motivations. A million question can be raised on what happened that fateful day, none of which could be conclusively answered.
At the very least, to the people who really mattered, his family, there was closure in the video which the deceased's sisters saw. They now know that it was no accident and there was no foul play involved. They also know now how much his family meant to him. What was clear from the video was this - he took a walk on the wild side, went for a dip and got scared and panicked when the tiger came up to him to say hello and invite him to play.
I recall a scene from an old black and white movie from the P. Ramlee era with the immortal line - kalau harimau tu ngap, saya tinggal ngep.
Like what Mr T always say - Pity the fool.
The one thing that struck a chord in me is the deceased's love for his family and his family's realisation that they meant the world to him. While he has gone, the ones left behind are left with a million what ifs. It's something that happens everywhere. We all take the people who matters most for granted sometimes and by the time we realise how much they meant to us, they're no longer there.
Sometimes, we talk to our family members with utmost disdain - that's me with my BILs - even if we don't mean it when they annoy us. We use their possessions without asking first and when we do ask for permission, it's sounds more like an expectation rather than a request. We use their stuff without any hint of responsibility and deny culpability when the things we used are damaged or in need of repairs. We talk down to our other half and to our young siblings. And we make no apologies for it.
Blame it on familiarity. Blame it on the safety net. Blame it familial ties. Blame it on the comfort zone. Blame it on everything but ourselves. We take things for granted. We demand that the car keys be handed over rather than asking for it with the slightest hint of politeness. When we do get the keys, there's no gratitude. We use our sibling's bike or MP3 player and we make no apologies if we happen to puncture a tyre or skidded and damaged the bike or damaged the MP3 player by dropping it in water.
As family, we expect to be forgiven and the misdeed brushed over. We expect our brother to give us the car key on demand, our sister to forget the big scratch on her MP3 player we borrowed, our father to pay for the damage we caused to the bike/car when we used it and we expect them not to bear grudges against us. But at the same time we cry foul if they damaged one of our possessions or demand that we hand over our possessions for them to borrow. We cry foul when our younger siblings disrespect us but we forget that we disrespected them too.
Honestly, I'm guilty of some of the above at some point or another. I'm not proud of it but I'll admit it. I'm no angel, I have disrespected my wife online (on these blogs no less), I have talked down my sister before and I have borrowed (more like demand) my family members' belongings for my own personal use.
Still, at the end of the day, our family would still forgive and accept us. But if we still find ourselves at the end of snide remarks such as Go get yourself a car or Are you really that poor to own an MP3 player, then we probably are still stepping on their toes.
At the very least, to the people who really mattered, his family, there was closure in the video which the deceased's sisters saw. They now know that it was no accident and there was no foul play involved. They also know now how much his family meant to him. What was clear from the video was this - he took a walk on the wild side, went for a dip and got scared and panicked when the tiger came up to him to say hello and invite him to play.
I recall a scene from an old black and white movie from the P. Ramlee era with the immortal line - kalau harimau tu ngap, saya tinggal ngep.
Like what Mr T always say - Pity the fool.
The one thing that struck a chord in me is the deceased's love for his family and his family's realisation that they meant the world to him. While he has gone, the ones left behind are left with a million what ifs. It's something that happens everywhere. We all take the people who matters most for granted sometimes and by the time we realise how much they meant to us, they're no longer there.
Sometimes, we talk to our family members with utmost disdain - that's me with my BILs - even if we don't mean it when they annoy us. We use their possessions without asking first and when we do ask for permission, it's sounds more like an expectation rather than a request. We use their stuff without any hint of responsibility and deny culpability when the things we used are damaged or in need of repairs. We talk down to our other half and to our young siblings. And we make no apologies for it.
Blame it on familiarity. Blame it on the safety net. Blame it familial ties. Blame it on the comfort zone. Blame it on everything but ourselves. We take things for granted. We demand that the car keys be handed over rather than asking for it with the slightest hint of politeness. When we do get the keys, there's no gratitude. We use our sibling's bike or MP3 player and we make no apologies if we happen to puncture a tyre or skidded and damaged the bike or damaged the MP3 player by dropping it in water.
As family, we expect to be forgiven and the misdeed brushed over. We expect our brother to give us the car key on demand, our sister to forget the big scratch on her MP3 player we borrowed, our father to pay for the damage we caused to the bike/car when we used it and we expect them not to bear grudges against us. But at the same time we cry foul if they damaged one of our possessions or demand that we hand over our possessions for them to borrow. We cry foul when our younger siblings disrespect us but we forget that we disrespected them too.
Honestly, I'm guilty of some of the above at some point or another. I'm not proud of it but I'll admit it. I'm no angel, I have disrespected my wife online (on these blogs no less), I have talked down my sister before and I have borrowed (more like demand) my family members' belongings for my own personal use.
Still, at the end of the day, our family would still forgive and accept us. But if we still find ourselves at the end of snide remarks such as Go get yourself a car or Are you really that poor to own an MP3 player, then we probably are still stepping on their toes.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Of hope and fear
Yeay!!!! Obama Won!!!
Wait a minute, I have no idea why I am rejoicing. The word on the street was one of optimism with stock markets the world over rallying at the news. Personally, as with many Singaporeans, I have no idea? what they were politicking about. Though many rooted for Obama, I doubt they knew what Obama's political allegiance was, much less his ideals. Was he a Democrat or Republican? Heck I don't even know one from the other.
Still, any idiot could have done better than the prick they now call Mr President. 8 years in charge with practically nothing to show for. The initial support GWB received in the wake of Sept 11 precipitated quickly and any sympathy garnered then quickly turned into disdain at the unilateralism and heavy handed approach. One suspects that in spite of his failings, he could have well worn that smug look at the dinner table, winking at his dad, probably saying, "Dad, I may not have achieved much but I got Saddam for you!".
Yeah, he got Saddam but look at the devastation he left behind. Iraq, in spite of Saddam's dictatorship and iron fist, was rather peaceful; just look at it now. GWB, to me, is like the Sheriff of the cowboy towns of the Wild West. He wades into a standoff with guns blazing and leaves behind a trail of destruction. When the smoke clears, you can see him sitting in a corner with that smug look on his face, thinking - "Hey, I got him didn't I?"
At least we all know Obama's not that much of a cowboy.
A little close to home, I read in the papers the other day about the stepfather who was jailed for child abuse all because he caned his stepson 100 times for incessant lying. In all honesty, I was shocked. Not at the number of times the boy was caned but the fact that he got jailed for it. My initial reaction was one of disbelief. Caned a 100 times? C'mon, many of us have gone through worse punishment than that; some of us had to endure inch thick leather belts complete with buckles. I had fresh red chilli smeared on my mouth for lying to my mom - and let me tell you the lingering aftertaste was enough to remind me from lying again.
I mean news such as this would play on the back of every parent who has to instill some form of discipline in their children. The parent would always be thinking if corporal punishment would lead to allegations of child abuse. We have to look at the physique of the child, the circumstances that led to corporal punishment and the gravity of the offence. It seems that corporal punishment is frowned upon more than ever. Gone were the days when the school rascals would get public caning - many parents won't allow their children to go through such punishment in school. Now, it seems that even the parents are not allowed to cane their children. Teachers are taught to look out for signs of child abuse such as cane marks on the children. However, upon reflection, I do agree that caning 100 times may be a bit excessive.
Personally, I believe that corporal punishment is a punishment that has to remain, even if it exists only as a threat. While children cannot be allowed to live in a climate of fear, there has to be an element of fear which will stop them from doing an act. Where discipline was once based on fear, parents have had to deal wiith ever more inquisitive children who not only defy them but question them. Where the standard answer of children in the face of an instruction use to be OK or Yes Mom/Dad/Sir, that has given way to but why.
Given the choice I couldn't resort to caning or belting by child. However, if she did step out of line I would. It all boils down to control. In order to have control over your children, you have to have control over yourself first. My guess is that was where the parent who was jailed failed. The lines that separate disciplinary measures and child abuse gets blurrier every minute we lose control of ourselves
Wait a minute, I have no idea why I am rejoicing. The word on the street was one of optimism with stock markets the world over rallying at the news. Personally, as with many Singaporeans, I have no idea? what they were politicking about. Though many rooted for Obama, I doubt they knew what Obama's political allegiance was, much less his ideals. Was he a Democrat or Republican? Heck I don't even know one from the other.
Still, any idiot could have done better than the prick they now call Mr President. 8 years in charge with practically nothing to show for. The initial support GWB received in the wake of Sept 11 precipitated quickly and any sympathy garnered then quickly turned into disdain at the unilateralism and heavy handed approach. One suspects that in spite of his failings, he could have well worn that smug look at the dinner table, winking at his dad, probably saying, "Dad, I may not have achieved much but I got Saddam for you!".
Yeah, he got Saddam but look at the devastation he left behind. Iraq, in spite of Saddam's dictatorship and iron fist, was rather peaceful; just look at it now. GWB, to me, is like the Sheriff of the cowboy towns of the Wild West. He wades into a standoff with guns blazing and leaves behind a trail of destruction. When the smoke clears, you can see him sitting in a corner with that smug look on his face, thinking - "Hey, I got him didn't I?"
At least we all know Obama's not that much of a cowboy.
A little close to home, I read in the papers the other day about the stepfather who was jailed for child abuse all because he caned his stepson 100 times for incessant lying. In all honesty, I was shocked. Not at the number of times the boy was caned but the fact that he got jailed for it. My initial reaction was one of disbelief. Caned a 100 times? C'mon, many of us have gone through worse punishment than that; some of us had to endure inch thick leather belts complete with buckles. I had fresh red chilli smeared on my mouth for lying to my mom - and let me tell you the lingering aftertaste was enough to remind me from lying again.
I mean news such as this would play on the back of every parent who has to instill some form of discipline in their children. The parent would always be thinking if corporal punishment would lead to allegations of child abuse. We have to look at the physique of the child, the circumstances that led to corporal punishment and the gravity of the offence. It seems that corporal punishment is frowned upon more than ever. Gone were the days when the school rascals would get public caning - many parents won't allow their children to go through such punishment in school. Now, it seems that even the parents are not allowed to cane their children. Teachers are taught to look out for signs of child abuse such as cane marks on the children. However, upon reflection, I do agree that caning 100 times may be a bit excessive.
Personally, I believe that corporal punishment is a punishment that has to remain, even if it exists only as a threat. While children cannot be allowed to live in a climate of fear, there has to be an element of fear which will stop them from doing an act. Where discipline was once based on fear, parents have had to deal wiith ever more inquisitive children who not only defy them but question them. Where the standard answer of children in the face of an instruction use to be OK or Yes Mom/Dad/Sir, that has given way to but why.
Given the choice I couldn't resort to caning or belting by child. However, if she did step out of line I would. It all boils down to control. In order to have control over your children, you have to have control over yourself first. My guess is that was where the parent who was jailed failed. The lines that separate disciplinary measures and child abuse gets blurrier every minute we lose control of ourselves
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
My disappointment
Such a depressing headline - I know. I'm feeling it. There are a few things on my mind which are eating away at me, just that somehow, letting it all out will hurt those around me. Funny especially coming from someone who normally speaks his mind with a callous disregard towards the feelings of others.
As some of you, my avid fans (just who am I kidding), can attest to, my dislike for some people (read: brother/sister-in-law) is almost legendary. Legendary enough to rival the fabled tales of Hercules, Achilles, Bonnie and Clyde, Billy the Kid and maybe, just maybe, Maradona. For those who happen to read this blog and are starting to feel queasy or starting to think, "Oh, here he goes again, blabbering about his family.", now's the perfect time to click the NEXT or CLOSE button before you read something that you didn't intend to or worse, badmouth me behind my back.. Yeap, I know it's going to ruffle feathers and hurt the feelings of a certain someone - my wife. This time, I felt I just have to let it loose. Been keeping it in for far too long.
Well, my princess celebrated her 1st birthday a month ago. As mentioned in one of my previous blogs, my wife and I meant for it to be a low-key affair. That meant no fancy parties or celebrations and definitely no cakes. She wouldn't have understood the significance of it anyway. In fact, minus the customary visit from our parents, some close friends and 2 of my wife's relatives, no one else came to our house during the whole of Aidilfitri, but that's a story for another day. What I found most disappointing was the lack of any gifts for her, with the exception of the gifts from my immediate family and both of us. Why does it bother me so much? Of course it does!!! Her uncles and aunts didn't even come to our house to see her on her birthday.
OK. Granted that it was in the first week of Aidilfitri plus the fact that it was exam period. Surely, a niece's birthday is worth remembering and worth taking the effort to see her. In the end, neither of her uncles (read: my brother-in-law) or aunties (read: sis-in-law) called to arrange to visit her, much less actually came over. Actually, her not receiving any gifts from my wife's side of the family wouldn't have been that noticeable if they had made an effort to celebrate it. Nothing. And to think that my wife had always made it a point to call her nieces and nephews on their birthdays and to buy presents for them.
I spoke to my wife about it and, truthfully, I know she was heartbroken by the acts, or lack thereof of her own brothers. Throwback 13 months and the same thing played out. Neither of her brothers called to ask how she was and to check up on her when she gave birth to our darling princess. They only came over to see her a few weeks later. You may ask, since I dislike them so much, why am I feeling disappointed?
The simple reason being, my disappointment is because I pity my wife for having such siblings and I pity my princess for having to call them uncles when she learns how to address them. Yes, I do ask myself why do I bother to seek for their forgiveness each and every Aidilfitri knowing full well that I may never give them the respect as elders. I can't say for sure if I have or can ever forgive them for making my wife feel the way she feels whenever we broach this subject.
Call me a hypocrite but that's never going to change how I interface with them. Outwardly, I may look like I'm showing them some level of respect. Deep down inside, there's nothing there but disdain. As much as I would love to give them a piece of my mind, I won't, even if it's only because I do not want my wife or my parents-in-law as the rope in a tug-of-war. My wife knows my stand on this. This exactly the reason why I refuse to go to their homes, unless there is a valid reason for me to do so.
Honestly, I'm not bothered by the lack of gifts. A simple visit to wish my princess happy birthday or even an attempt to make such an arrangement would have sufficed. I guess we, as a family, are not worth the effort to some.
As some of you, my avid fans (just who am I kidding), can attest to, my dislike for some people (read: brother/sister-in-law) is almost legendary. Legendary enough to rival the fabled tales of Hercules, Achilles, Bonnie and Clyde, Billy the Kid and maybe, just maybe, Maradona. For those who happen to read this blog and are starting to feel queasy or starting to think, "Oh, here he goes again, blabbering about his family.", now's the perfect time to click the NEXT or CLOSE button before you read something that you didn't intend to or worse, badmouth me behind my back.. Yeap, I know it's going to ruffle feathers and hurt the feelings of a certain someone - my wife. This time, I felt I just have to let it loose. Been keeping it in for far too long.
Well, my princess celebrated her 1st birthday a month ago. As mentioned in one of my previous blogs, my wife and I meant for it to be a low-key affair. That meant no fancy parties or celebrations and definitely no cakes. She wouldn't have understood the significance of it anyway. In fact, minus the customary visit from our parents, some close friends and 2 of my wife's relatives, no one else came to our house during the whole of Aidilfitri, but that's a story for another day. What I found most disappointing was the lack of any gifts for her, with the exception of the gifts from my immediate family and both of us. Why does it bother me so much? Of course it does!!! Her uncles and aunts didn't even come to our house to see her on her birthday.
OK. Granted that it was in the first week of Aidilfitri plus the fact that it was exam period. Surely, a niece's birthday is worth remembering and worth taking the effort to see her. In the end, neither of her uncles (read: my brother-in-law) or aunties (read: sis-in-law) called to arrange to visit her, much less actually came over. Actually, her not receiving any gifts from my wife's side of the family wouldn't have been that noticeable if they had made an effort to celebrate it. Nothing. And to think that my wife had always made it a point to call her nieces and nephews on their birthdays and to buy presents for them.
I spoke to my wife about it and, truthfully, I know she was heartbroken by the acts, or lack thereof of her own brothers. Throwback 13 months and the same thing played out. Neither of her brothers called to ask how she was and to check up on her when she gave birth to our darling princess. They only came over to see her a few weeks later. You may ask, since I dislike them so much, why am I feeling disappointed?
The simple reason being, my disappointment is because I pity my wife for having such siblings and I pity my princess for having to call them uncles when she learns how to address them. Yes, I do ask myself why do I bother to seek for their forgiveness each and every Aidilfitri knowing full well that I may never give them the respect as elders. I can't say for sure if I have or can ever forgive them for making my wife feel the way she feels whenever we broach this subject.
Call me a hypocrite but that's never going to change how I interface with them. Outwardly, I may look like I'm showing them some level of respect. Deep down inside, there's nothing there but disdain. As much as I would love to give them a piece of my mind, I won't, even if it's only because I do not want my wife or my parents-in-law as the rope in a tug-of-war. My wife knows my stand on this. This exactly the reason why I refuse to go to their homes, unless there is a valid reason for me to do so.
Honestly, I'm not bothered by the lack of gifts. A simple visit to wish my princess happy birthday or even an attempt to make such an arrangement would have sufficed. I guess we, as a family, are not worth the effort to some.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
An ANALysis of Singaporeans.......
Singapore is a FINE city. Uniquely Singapore.
Yeah, we've seen the adverts and some of us has, as tacky as they are, bought the t-shirts too. There are things we're all proud to have achieved as a nation like having the world's best airport or the world's best port. I think, especially after reading the papers 2 days ago, we can pride ourselves at being the most anal in the world. Pardon my language.
Where else in the world could someone be fined for falling asleep in a public park? I can't think of any. OK, granted that I haven't been to many parts of the world and haven't ventured further than Java, East Malaysia and the Malaysia-Thai border, it still borders on the ludicrous that one could be fined for sleeping in a public park.
My eyes almost popped out at that headline and upon further reading, I felt compassion for the sleeper and utter disgust at the park ranger. I just can't fathom how someone falling asleep at a park bench while taking refuge from the rain can be deemed as a nuisance or even a hazard to other park users. Have you seen the number of dogs running around unleashed and the psychopaths who call themselves cyclists darting around in the very same parks?
I mean, c'mon, I'd have no qualms with summons being issued against inconsiderate park users such as those who practically set up a temporary home complete with cordons in a public park. I'd be smirking at the fellow who let his dog run unleashed and pee and poo all over the park without cleaning up after it. The defining issue is being inconsiderate. I think many Singaporeans fail in the respect and they do so miserably.
I'm not even going to talk about road users. I've practically given up hope of having peaceful drive where I don't have to maintain a vigilant eye on every corner. I'm referring to the recently publicised issue of returning your plates after eating at the local foodcourts. Something as simple as that but we all find it hard to do. Personally, I try to make it a point to clear my table, not for the next patron, but to ease the load on the cleaners, who more often than not, are senior citizens. Most tmes, I'm greeted with a great big smile and a nice thank you when they accept my used utensils at the clearing point. Gratitute, no doubt, that they have one less table to clear.
Almost all the local guys go through NS and no one dares leave behind his food tray unless they want to get left behind during book-out day. It's such a simple thing yet we just can't do it. Just this afternoon during lunch with the wife at one of the many foodcourts, I saw just how many people conveniently walk away from their tables without even attempting to clear their table. Is it because they are wearing business attire and cleaning up is beneath them that makes them act that way?
Honestly, if the nice old lady didn't come to my table to cart away my crockery at the time when I was stacking them up, I'd have done it myself. the fact that she said thank you to me for helping her stacking up my utensils to make it easier for her to carry it away speaks volumes of her character and just makes the inconsiderate act of many patrons. What is it about us Singaporeans that we can't do something as basic as this?
Is it the rat race that makes us so self-centered and so self-enamoured that we consider the basics of courtesy an being considerate beneath us? I mean most of us don't have maids to clean up and we don't expect our parents to clean up after us, but yet, we expect the elderly cleaners at the foodcourts to do the same for us. The best part of it all, many of us even ignores the cleaners after clearing up the table for us without even a hint of gratitude for giving us a cleaner place to eat, much less a smile and a thank you.
Try asking your mother to wipe the table clean before you eat and you might just get a stare so deep, your stomach churns. Go and complain to your father when your mother gives you that stare and he might just throw you out of the house.
Now, all we need is another campaign. I'm sure it will work just as well as how the courtesy campaign worked for us.
PS: Wave as a thank you doesn't mean you wave only your middle finger.
Yeah, we've seen the adverts and some of us has, as tacky as they are, bought the t-shirts too. There are things we're all proud to have achieved as a nation like having the world's best airport or the world's best port. I think, especially after reading the papers 2 days ago, we can pride ourselves at being the most anal in the world. Pardon my language.
Where else in the world could someone be fined for falling asleep in a public park? I can't think of any. OK, granted that I haven't been to many parts of the world and haven't ventured further than Java, East Malaysia and the Malaysia-Thai border, it still borders on the ludicrous that one could be fined for sleeping in a public park.
My eyes almost popped out at that headline and upon further reading, I felt compassion for the sleeper and utter disgust at the park ranger. I just can't fathom how someone falling asleep at a park bench while taking refuge from the rain can be deemed as a nuisance or even a hazard to other park users. Have you seen the number of dogs running around unleashed and the psychopaths who call themselves cyclists darting around in the very same parks?
I mean, c'mon, I'd have no qualms with summons being issued against inconsiderate park users such as those who practically set up a temporary home complete with cordons in a public park. I'd be smirking at the fellow who let his dog run unleashed and pee and poo all over the park without cleaning up after it. The defining issue is being inconsiderate. I think many Singaporeans fail in the respect and they do so miserably.
I'm not even going to talk about road users. I've practically given up hope of having peaceful drive where I don't have to maintain a vigilant eye on every corner. I'm referring to the recently publicised issue of returning your plates after eating at the local foodcourts. Something as simple as that but we all find it hard to do. Personally, I try to make it a point to clear my table, not for the next patron, but to ease the load on the cleaners, who more often than not, are senior citizens. Most tmes, I'm greeted with a great big smile and a nice thank you when they accept my used utensils at the clearing point. Gratitute, no doubt, that they have one less table to clear.
Almost all the local guys go through NS and no one dares leave behind his food tray unless they want to get left behind during book-out day. It's such a simple thing yet we just can't do it. Just this afternoon during lunch with the wife at one of the many foodcourts, I saw just how many people conveniently walk away from their tables without even attempting to clear their table. Is it because they are wearing business attire and cleaning up is beneath them that makes them act that way?
Honestly, if the nice old lady didn't come to my table to cart away my crockery at the time when I was stacking them up, I'd have done it myself. the fact that she said thank you to me for helping her stacking up my utensils to make it easier for her to carry it away speaks volumes of her character and just makes the inconsiderate act of many patrons. What is it about us Singaporeans that we can't do something as basic as this?
Is it the rat race that makes us so self-centered and so self-enamoured that we consider the basics of courtesy an being considerate beneath us? I mean most of us don't have maids to clean up and we don't expect our parents to clean up after us, but yet, we expect the elderly cleaners at the foodcourts to do the same for us. The best part of it all, many of us even ignores the cleaners after clearing up the table for us without even a hint of gratitude for giving us a cleaner place to eat, much less a smile and a thank you.
Try asking your mother to wipe the table clean before you eat and you might just get a stare so deep, your stomach churns. Go and complain to your father when your mother gives you that stare and he might just throw you out of the house.
Now, all we need is another campaign. I'm sure it will work just as well as how the courtesy campaign worked for us.
PS: Wave as a thank you doesn't mean you wave only your middle finger.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Hoping for calm
Here comes the bear...
Haven't you heard? Technically, we are in a recession. The first time we've had a technical recession since 2002. That came off the back of the 1997 Asian financial crisis. In fact it's been a long-time coming. Something we've always known was gonna be here, a matter of when, not if. I'm no financial analyst, neither am I a stock market savvy person, but the signs were here more than a year ago when the world economy hit a speed bump and oil prices started escalating to record prices.
Back then, I kinda had a feeling that a recession is gonna hit us soon. Now that it's here, the word on the street is that depression may set in. If it ever get's that bad, then we'll all be in for a rough ride. Should I be worried? With all the talk of recession and depression ala 1930's, who wouldn't be? In an instant, life savings could be wiped out, bankruptcies and joblessness. Still I retain a little bit of optimism, in spite of all the turmoil swirling around us. While we are still being buffeted from the worst of the storm, and while I expect that it won't be long before it smacks us right in the face, I believe, it's not the end of the world.
Right now, while I do fear what the future may hold, I have faith that it will get better. It's only a matter of time. The only problem for many of us is that we suffer losses we think are too great for us to bear. Then when the fear sets in and panic starts, our hopes turn into desperation. Honestly, I won't be surprised to read of suicides when the economy don't rebound as quickly or takes a turn for the worse. I can only pray that none of my friends come to that.
I for one will hold on steadfastly to my shares....I mean beliefs that it will get better.....I hope...
Speaking of hope, fear, panic and the erosion of confidence, I can't understand the attitude of some Singaporeans. Case in point, the middle-class folks living in Serangoon Gardens.
First of all, if the people living in Serangoon Gardens and other landed properties are middle-class, does that makes 70% of Singaporeans who live in HDBs low-class? Where does that put the Condo owners and those who are renting and not owning their own flats? Or is it the fact that they live on landed property that makes them more sophisticated than the rest of us and gives them the right to be snooty and snobbish. C'mon, you all breathe the same polluted air I do, and don't you dare call me low-class!!!
Secondly, what's the hullabaloo about the foreign worker dormitories being set up in Serangoon Gardens? I can't begin to understand the resistance to the dormitory being setup there. Security? C'mon, since when did Singapore become an exclusive society and why pigeon-hole the foreigners as a security threat? Are we really that better than them?
Lastly, have the folks at Serangoon Gardens forgotten who we, Singaporeans, really are? We were, if I am to be honest, are just a bunch of immigrants flocking to this little red in search of a better life for ourselves and a better future for our children. Off the 5.8 million people who call Singapore home, one would be hard-pressed to find anyone who can trace their lineage back to the original inhabitants of Singapore - all the back to when Raffles landed here.
Save for the few, we all can trace our ancestors to lands as far away as Indonesia, Arabia, India and Mainland China to mention a few. We all fought for our stake in this land over the decades, why deny the hopeful newcomers their chance at a better life? You won't live forever and your children may even go off to other countries and stay there.
Personally, I think it's all to do with our fear of the unknown and uncertain. When the unknown and uncertain gets forced upon us, the erosion of our faith and our beliefs starts. And when hope turns to despair, fear and panic sets in. My guess, is, that's what's gripping the world and to a certain extent, Serangoon Garden folks.
Haven't you heard? Technically, we are in a recession. The first time we've had a technical recession since 2002. That came off the back of the 1997 Asian financial crisis. In fact it's been a long-time coming. Something we've always known was gonna be here, a matter of when, not if. I'm no financial analyst, neither am I a stock market savvy person, but the signs were here more than a year ago when the world economy hit a speed bump and oil prices started escalating to record prices.
Back then, I kinda had a feeling that a recession is gonna hit us soon. Now that it's here, the word on the street is that depression may set in. If it ever get's that bad, then we'll all be in for a rough ride. Should I be worried? With all the talk of recession and depression ala 1930's, who wouldn't be? In an instant, life savings could be wiped out, bankruptcies and joblessness. Still I retain a little bit of optimism, in spite of all the turmoil swirling around us. While we are still being buffeted from the worst of the storm, and while I expect that it won't be long before it smacks us right in the face, I believe, it's not the end of the world.
Right now, while I do fear what the future may hold, I have faith that it will get better. It's only a matter of time. The only problem for many of us is that we suffer losses we think are too great for us to bear. Then when the fear sets in and panic starts, our hopes turn into desperation. Honestly, I won't be surprised to read of suicides when the economy don't rebound as quickly or takes a turn for the worse. I can only pray that none of my friends come to that.
I for one will hold on steadfastly to my shares....I mean beliefs that it will get better.....I hope...
Speaking of hope, fear, panic and the erosion of confidence, I can't understand the attitude of some Singaporeans. Case in point, the middle-class folks living in Serangoon Gardens.
First of all, if the people living in Serangoon Gardens and other landed properties are middle-class, does that makes 70% of Singaporeans who live in HDBs low-class? Where does that put the Condo owners and those who are renting and not owning their own flats? Or is it the fact that they live on landed property that makes them more sophisticated than the rest of us and gives them the right to be snooty and snobbish. C'mon, you all breathe the same polluted air I do, and don't you dare call me low-class!!!
Secondly, what's the hullabaloo about the foreign worker dormitories being set up in Serangoon Gardens? I can't begin to understand the resistance to the dormitory being setup there. Security? C'mon, since when did Singapore become an exclusive society and why pigeon-hole the foreigners as a security threat? Are we really that better than them?
Lastly, have the folks at Serangoon Gardens forgotten who we, Singaporeans, really are? We were, if I am to be honest, are just a bunch of immigrants flocking to this little red in search of a better life for ourselves and a better future for our children. Off the 5.8 million people who call Singapore home, one would be hard-pressed to find anyone who can trace their lineage back to the original inhabitants of Singapore - all the back to when Raffles landed here.
Save for the few, we all can trace our ancestors to lands as far away as Indonesia, Arabia, India and Mainland China to mention a few. We all fought for our stake in this land over the decades, why deny the hopeful newcomers their chance at a better life? You won't live forever and your children may even go off to other countries and stay there.
Personally, I think it's all to do with our fear of the unknown and uncertain. When the unknown and uncertain gets forced upon us, the erosion of our faith and our beliefs starts. And when hope turns to despair, fear and panic sets in. My guess, is, that's what's gripping the world and to a certain extent, Serangoon Garden folks.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
The Hari Raya and the day she turned 1
Yeah, I know, it's 2 days late. It's her special day. A year to the day I first laid my eyes on her, heard her cries, cradled her in my arms and kissed her on her forehead. Not a day went by without me uttering praises to Him for His gift to us.
Blessed? That's really a mild understatement.
This year's Aidilfitri was a more meaningful and blissful affair for me as compared to the debacle that was last year. We managed to dress up nicely as a family and went about the visiting with the rest of the family. I joked with my wife about setting Izza a target for her "collection" money. As we both took leave on Thursday and Friday, it offered us more time and a less hectic schedule for our visits. We visited those relatives we didn't see last year and some were pleasantly surprised that there's now 3 of us. Obviously, no one told them about our bundle of joy.
Went back to my wife's Mak Andak place in Ayer Hitam on Friday. The planned trip was to start at 9am but we only left Singapore at 11. This was, as usual, through no fault of ours. We only reached Ayer Hitam at 1.30pm and didn't even make it to Kluang to her Mak Long's place as she was out. Glad we went on a weekday though. Travelling to Ayer Hitam and Kluang to visit 2 houses only doesn't seem to be a good plan for a weekend - half a day gone with only 2 houses covered. Not god for me - as the driver, and not good for Izza - for her collection.
Wifey had wanted us to just stay home on Sunday and have a quiet time to ourselves, though that would be a big ask of Izza - she just can't keep still nowadays, especially after 4 days of almost non-stop house visiting. Yeah, we were tired, more so our little princess. Still, I decided to go ahead with the initial plan, which was to meet up with my family and continue visiting relatives. I did make a promise to my wife that whatever it is and no matter whose house was next on the agenda, we'd cut our day at 5pm. This would give us some downtime with her, not to mention some rest as we were working on Monday.
The previous 4 days of action probably took a lot out of her. She slept in the car from 3.30pm and only woke up at home at 7pm. In between, some extended family members dropped by to see the birthday girl only to be disappointed to find out that she's asleep.Oh, and in the midst playing on our bed, just before she slept, she somehow managed to lose her footing and slipped of our platform bed and fell on the carpeted floor. Needless to say, tears were shed but she showed no ill-effects after that. Surprisingly, she fell asleep at 10.30pm again - that's how tired she was.
Although we didn't get to celebrate her birthday, not that we were planning to hold a party or anything of that sort, we did take some time to buy a new toy for her yesterday during lunch. Well, she loved her new toy, judging by her reactions. And there's more courtesy from her uncle and aunt and her grandparents.
Blessed? That's really a mild understatement.
This year's Aidilfitri was a more meaningful and blissful affair for me as compared to the debacle that was last year. We managed to dress up nicely as a family and went about the visiting with the rest of the family. I joked with my wife about setting Izza a target for her "collection" money. As we both took leave on Thursday and Friday, it offered us more time and a less hectic schedule for our visits. We visited those relatives we didn't see last year and some were pleasantly surprised that there's now 3 of us. Obviously, no one told them about our bundle of joy.
Went back to my wife's Mak Andak place in Ayer Hitam on Friday. The planned trip was to start at 9am but we only left Singapore at 11. This was, as usual, through no fault of ours. We only reached Ayer Hitam at 1.30pm and didn't even make it to Kluang to her Mak Long's place as she was out. Glad we went on a weekday though. Travelling to Ayer Hitam and Kluang to visit 2 houses only doesn't seem to be a good plan for a weekend - half a day gone with only 2 houses covered. Not god for me - as the driver, and not good for Izza - for her collection.
Wifey had wanted us to just stay home on Sunday and have a quiet time to ourselves, though that would be a big ask of Izza - she just can't keep still nowadays, especially after 4 days of almost non-stop house visiting. Yeah, we were tired, more so our little princess. Still, I decided to go ahead with the initial plan, which was to meet up with my family and continue visiting relatives. I did make a promise to my wife that whatever it is and no matter whose house was next on the agenda, we'd cut our day at 5pm. This would give us some downtime with her, not to mention some rest as we were working on Monday.
The previous 4 days of action probably took a lot out of her. She slept in the car from 3.30pm and only woke up at home at 7pm. In between, some extended family members dropped by to see the birthday girl only to be disappointed to find out that she's asleep.Oh, and in the midst playing on our bed, just before she slept, she somehow managed to lose her footing and slipped of our platform bed and fell on the carpeted floor. Needless to say, tears were shed but she showed no ill-effects after that. Surprisingly, she fell asleep at 10.30pm again - that's how tired she was.
Although we didn't get to celebrate her birthday, not that we were planning to hold a party or anything of that sort, we did take some time to buy a new toy for her yesterday during lunch. Well, she loved her new toy, judging by her reactions. And there's more courtesy from her uncle and aunt and her grandparents.
Friday, September 26, 2008
That Aidilfitri Conundrum
We're a few days away from the big day. No, not the first ever Formula 1 night race. I'm referring to Aidilfitri. Well, the race is exciting in some ways but it can never be as exciting as celebrating Aidilfirti.....
For goodness sake, I'm gushing like 11-year old who can't stop thinking about duit collection. Lest, I forget, I'm 31 now and Aidilfitri has not been the same for me since I finished school. In fact, I don't remember receiving any green packets since I was 18. Even if I was offered, I'd kindly decline it from my elderly relatives, some of whom I hardly recognise, let alone know their names. When we were younger, Ramadhan was always about how many days of fasting we could manage and Syawal was definitely about how much moolah we could generate.
I could still remember being teased and taunted by my Muslim classmates if and when I skipped a day of fasting. The pressure was on us kids to maintain our inner strength by fasting.....oh, who am I kidding. It's all about avoiding the teasing and the taunting. Even if we could not fast the whole day, we'd try to keep up appearances just to look that we were indeed fasting by staying away from the canteen during recess. Plus the fact that constant reminders from our closer relatives that the kids who do not fast don't get to celebrate Aidilfitri - meaning no moolah. We did our fasting - but for all the wrong reasons.
Where it was once uncool not to be fasting, it seems to be even more uncool nowadays to be fasting. Too often have I seen young kids, barely out of their teens, walking hand-in-hand with their special one, cigarette in one hand, soft drink in the other hand. Just when I try to reason that probably the girl couldn't fast because of her period, the boy takes a long drag on his ciggie and gulps down the drink as soon as he exhales. Sometimes I ask myself, do these kid know they don't get to celebrate Aidilfitri if they don't fast?
The real meaning of Aidilfitri has been obscured by the excesses of today's youth. Where Aidilfitri was a supposed to be a celebration for the successful completion of fasting - an abstinence from our vice and excesses - it has become a commercial celebration for some, replete with the showcasing of new clothes and accesories, they may not wear again for another year. Then again, who am I to comment on it? I just hope my daughter doesn't fall into that spiral.
Another gripe I have about Aidilfitri, and this is played out year by year, is the question of where to go and when to go. No!!! Not the Bazaar in Geylang. I meant the destinations of the eve of Aidilfitri and the day itself - and I'm referring to which parents' house first on each day. Every year, the same question gets asked and the same conundrum strikes again. It's a conundrum that bugs and irks me all the same everytime. And almost without fail at least one of us ends up feeling like crap.
Every couple has their own way of dealing with this sticky issue. Sadly, after 5 years, we have yet to reach an agreeable plan we both can stick to every year. The only break was last Aidilfitri when she just gave birth and this issue didn't crop up - though a much bigger one played out in the end. I mean, me being the eldest son and her being the youngest and only daughter makes it just that bit harder to decide where our priority should lie. For me, it's clear that since I'm the eldest son, we should spend more time at my parent's place. For her, since she's the youngest and the only daughter, she is expected to help out her parents.
Blame it on filial piety. We both got our own set of parents and there's no denying that our individual sense of filial piety are at odds with each other. While we try to be fair to each other, that Holy Grail of of any relationshop - the common ground - is much harder to reach than anyone thought. Well, good luck to me then to find that common ground.
For goodness sake, I'm gushing like 11-year old who can't stop thinking about duit collection. Lest, I forget, I'm 31 now and Aidilfitri has not been the same for me since I finished school. In fact, I don't remember receiving any green packets since I was 18. Even if I was offered, I'd kindly decline it from my elderly relatives, some of whom I hardly recognise, let alone know their names. When we were younger, Ramadhan was always about how many days of fasting we could manage and Syawal was definitely about how much moolah we could generate.
I could still remember being teased and taunted by my Muslim classmates if and when I skipped a day of fasting. The pressure was on us kids to maintain our inner strength by fasting.....oh, who am I kidding. It's all about avoiding the teasing and the taunting. Even if we could not fast the whole day, we'd try to keep up appearances just to look that we were indeed fasting by staying away from the canteen during recess. Plus the fact that constant reminders from our closer relatives that the kids who do not fast don't get to celebrate Aidilfitri - meaning no moolah. We did our fasting - but for all the wrong reasons.
Where it was once uncool not to be fasting, it seems to be even more uncool nowadays to be fasting. Too often have I seen young kids, barely out of their teens, walking hand-in-hand with their special one, cigarette in one hand, soft drink in the other hand. Just when I try to reason that probably the girl couldn't fast because of her period, the boy takes a long drag on his ciggie and gulps down the drink as soon as he exhales. Sometimes I ask myself, do these kid know they don't get to celebrate Aidilfitri if they don't fast?
The real meaning of Aidilfitri has been obscured by the excesses of today's youth. Where Aidilfitri was a supposed to be a celebration for the successful completion of fasting - an abstinence from our vice and excesses - it has become a commercial celebration for some, replete with the showcasing of new clothes and accesories, they may not wear again for another year. Then again, who am I to comment on it? I just hope my daughter doesn't fall into that spiral.
Another gripe I have about Aidilfitri, and this is played out year by year, is the question of where to go and when to go. No!!! Not the Bazaar in Geylang. I meant the destinations of the eve of Aidilfitri and the day itself - and I'm referring to which parents' house first on each day. Every year, the same question gets asked and the same conundrum strikes again. It's a conundrum that bugs and irks me all the same everytime. And almost without fail at least one of us ends up feeling like crap.
Every couple has their own way of dealing with this sticky issue. Sadly, after 5 years, we have yet to reach an agreeable plan we both can stick to every year. The only break was last Aidilfitri when she just gave birth and this issue didn't crop up - though a much bigger one played out in the end. I mean, me being the eldest son and her being the youngest and only daughter makes it just that bit harder to decide where our priority should lie. For me, it's clear that since I'm the eldest son, we should spend more time at my parent's place. For her, since she's the youngest and the only daughter, she is expected to help out her parents.
Blame it on filial piety. We both got our own set of parents and there's no denying that our individual sense of filial piety are at odds with each other. While we try to be fair to each other, that Holy Grail of of any relationshop - the common ground - is much harder to reach than anyone thought. Well, good luck to me then to find that common ground.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Racing through....
Ladies and Gentlemen, rev your engines!!!!
Yeap! Formula 1 weekend is finally here. Wait!!! Why am I getting excited??
Honestly, I've always thought that it was a waste of time to attend a motorsport event in person. I mean, why go to the races when you can probably only watch the part of the race where you are at while missing the action at other sections. Plus, the sky-high prices for the pit garage grandstand tickets are enough to put most people, bar the die-hards and the uber rich. I've always told myself that I would stay away from the Marina Bay area cos the crowds would probably be too much for me. In any case, I won't know who's in the lead at the races and all I'll get is just a ringing sensation in my ears and glazed eyes from watching the cars zoom by. So, come this weekend, you're more likely to find me trawling through the narrow walkways of the Ramadan Bazaar at Geylang Serai.
Speaking of which, I have yet to go there this year. That is, in itself, a record of sorts. I have always made it a point to soak up the atmosphere there, not to mention the sights, sounds and, urgh, smells of sweat and smoke. This year, however, I have put that off till the very last weekend of Ramadan. Not that I have lost the spirit for festivities, rather, it's the presence of my daughter that puts me off going there. The small walkways and the claustrophobic surroundings can freak an adult out, more so, a baby. On one hand, I wanted to expose her to the bazaar but on the other hand, I'm concerned for her safety; not to mention wanting to avoid having to go through one of her cranky periods. Still, I have to make my way there this weekend. I still have some last minute stuff to buy, a new carpet being high on the agenda.
On the topic of new stuff, there are those amongst us who think nothing of changing furniture or personal accessories on a whim, especially with Aidilfitri being around the corner. There a some families who'd change furniture just because there is a small chip on the wooden sofa or a scratch on the metal coffee table. Personally, I can neeither identify with that nor can I keep up with them. It's almost engrained in our culture that we must keep up with the times. Quoting a famous line from an old Malay Movie, 'Orang ada rumah baru, dia mahu rumah , baru. Orang ada radio baru, dia mahu radio baru. Orang ada kreta baru, dia mahu kreta baru". In short, "I want what they got".
Funny. This line has been said countless times in many a rerun. No doubt meant as a poke in our cultural ribs, it has yet to bring about a meaning that resonates in our community - prudence. At times, we put undue pressure on ourselves not to be seen as outdated, we sometimes overspend and live beyond our means. It's no surprise that there many amongst our community who live in debt. So what if it's old? If it ain't broke, dun fix it. I'l readily admit that at some points in my life, in my pursuit of acceptance, I was dragged into this mindset of trying to keep up. Thanks to my financial controller, read: wife, that has been kept in check. Else, I'd be just another name in the OA's list.
Where there was once a tingling feeling everytime I saw a new gadget launched, it's now just a numbed feeling. Why? Simply because, most of my wants has been vetoed so many times, I've practically given up hope of ever attaining them. Thanks dear, for enforcing a sense of prudence in me..
Yeap! Formula 1 weekend is finally here. Wait!!! Why am I getting excited??
Honestly, I've always thought that it was a waste of time to attend a motorsport event in person. I mean, why go to the races when you can probably only watch the part of the race where you are at while missing the action at other sections. Plus, the sky-high prices for the pit garage grandstand tickets are enough to put most people, bar the die-hards and the uber rich. I've always told myself that I would stay away from the Marina Bay area cos the crowds would probably be too much for me. In any case, I won't know who's in the lead at the races and all I'll get is just a ringing sensation in my ears and glazed eyes from watching the cars zoom by. So, come this weekend, you're more likely to find me trawling through the narrow walkways of the Ramadan Bazaar at Geylang Serai.
Speaking of which, I have yet to go there this year. That is, in itself, a record of sorts. I have always made it a point to soak up the atmosphere there, not to mention the sights, sounds and, urgh, smells of sweat and smoke. This year, however, I have put that off till the very last weekend of Ramadan. Not that I have lost the spirit for festivities, rather, it's the presence of my daughter that puts me off going there. The small walkways and the claustrophobic surroundings can freak an adult out, more so, a baby. On one hand, I wanted to expose her to the bazaar but on the other hand, I'm concerned for her safety; not to mention wanting to avoid having to go through one of her cranky periods. Still, I have to make my way there this weekend. I still have some last minute stuff to buy, a new carpet being high on the agenda.
On the topic of new stuff, there are those amongst us who think nothing of changing furniture or personal accessories on a whim, especially with Aidilfitri being around the corner. There a some families who'd change furniture just because there is a small chip on the wooden sofa or a scratch on the metal coffee table. Personally, I can neeither identify with that nor can I keep up with them. It's almost engrained in our culture that we must keep up with the times. Quoting a famous line from an old Malay Movie, 'Orang ada rumah baru, dia mahu rumah , baru. Orang ada radio baru, dia mahu radio baru. Orang ada kreta baru, dia mahu kreta baru". In short, "I want what they got".
Funny. This line has been said countless times in many a rerun. No doubt meant as a poke in our cultural ribs, it has yet to bring about a meaning that resonates in our community - prudence. At times, we put undue pressure on ourselves not to be seen as outdated, we sometimes overspend and live beyond our means. It's no surprise that there many amongst our community who live in debt. So what if it's old? If it ain't broke, dun fix it. I'l readily admit that at some points in my life, in my pursuit of acceptance, I was dragged into this mindset of trying to keep up. Thanks to my financial controller, read: wife, that has been kept in check. Else, I'd be just another name in the OA's list.
Where there was once a tingling feeling everytime I saw a new gadget launched, it's now just a numbed feeling. Why? Simply because, most of my wants has been vetoed so many times, I've practically given up hope of ever attaining them. Thanks dear, for enforcing a sense of prudence in me..
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Friends.............
My blog has undergone through so many resuscitation, it should have been dead and buried by now. As it is, there is still a pulse, just barely. The last time I blabbered about something, it was about the National Day Rally. A month ago.
Since then, we all have gone through some rough times, in terms of the global economic outlook that it makes the Asian Financial Crisis of 1998 look easy. Not since the Great Depression in the 30s has there been so much turmoil in the financial markets around the world. Havoc. Recession looms larger then we might think at some point. Things are looking up in the last few days with the US government vowing not to allow the market to slip into freefall being a welcome respite.
From a global issue to more personal issue.
My wife has always commented how lucky I am to have a big pool of friends. I used to think so myself. There were some points in my life where there wasn't just enough time to devote to a particular group of friends for an extended period. I mean, one weekend would be with a group, another weekend with a different group. What I came to realise was that, I never really had a group of friends whom I have stuck with from the day I had friends. Even now, I don't have a specific group whom I meet up with regularly.
I mean, yeah, I know lots of people and seldom would I be out and about without meeting a familiar face. However, familiarity does not equate to a close bond. Most of the people I know are acquaintances more than friends. People whom have entered my life at some point, for some fleeting moment and left as soon as they appeared. Those that I call friends are those who, at the very least, have my number on their mobile, or have me on Multiply or Friendster. Other than the occasional 'hi's and 'bye's, or the occasional, 'Hey bro, you free? I need your help.', I almost never get the 'Hey bro, you free? Let's meetup for coffee' kind of message/call.
Not that I am complaining. I mean, I'm happier spending time with my baby rather than to spend time with friends who call me out only when they need my help. My wife is different. She is not as sociable and not as friendly as I am. Unlike me, she can't strike up a conversation with someone she barely knows. She does, however, have 2 groups of friends whom she meets up with on a fairly regular basis. 2 friends from her secondary school and 4 from her workplace whom she is especially close to. of her 4 friends from her workplace, 1 is married, while the other 3 are still single. Of the 3 singletons, 1 of them seem to be drifting away, while the other 2 maintains close contact with her.
Having met her workplace friends quite often, I have grown to know them personally. The friend who is married is now mother of three and a full-time housewife. My wife and her 2 friends have always seen the married one as the luckiest. Loving husband, 3 lovely kids, a nice flat and a car. What more could a woman ask for, right?? Recently, it seems, that their marriage is on the rocks and heading towards divorce. Vaguely, I know that the husband has found another woman. Surprising, very surprising indeed. He's always seemed like a faithful husband. He's not that handsome and neither is he filthy rich. So it came as a surprise to us all.
It's very sad to hear of this development, seeing how she has stopped working to become a fulltime housewife and devoting herself to him and their family, only to have that devotion betrayed by his infidelity. Personally, the D-word did cross my mind at some points in my life, especially when I thought that our relationship had broken down irretrievably. I mean, I admit that there were times when I thought I could no longer live with her or her family members. However, at no point did I ever consider having another woman.
Invariably, just when we thought life could not be any better, it takes a plunge downhill. And when it seems there can be no light at the end of that dark tunnel, a tiny ray of light peeks through. I have never doubted our individual strengths as human beings, and the wonders the body can do when the mind is focused. Thus, I'm sure my wife's friend would come out of this stronger and a better person. I do pray for her happiness as well as her other friends'.
The same goes to my friends, whoever and wherever they may be. I'm always there for them. Be it a loan, help with their car or just a listening ear when you think you've reached the lowest ebb of your life, I'll help where I can..........even if you don't intend to ask me out for a drink anytime soon.
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!
Since then, we all have gone through some rough times, in terms of the global economic outlook that it makes the Asian Financial Crisis of 1998 look easy. Not since the Great Depression in the 30s has there been so much turmoil in the financial markets around the world. Havoc. Recession looms larger then we might think at some point. Things are looking up in the last few days with the US government vowing not to allow the market to slip into freefall being a welcome respite.
From a global issue to more personal issue.
My wife has always commented how lucky I am to have a big pool of friends. I used to think so myself. There were some points in my life where there wasn't just enough time to devote to a particular group of friends for an extended period. I mean, one weekend would be with a group, another weekend with a different group. What I came to realise was that, I never really had a group of friends whom I have stuck with from the day I had friends. Even now, I don't have a specific group whom I meet up with regularly.
I mean, yeah, I know lots of people and seldom would I be out and about without meeting a familiar face. However, familiarity does not equate to a close bond. Most of the people I know are acquaintances more than friends. People whom have entered my life at some point, for some fleeting moment and left as soon as they appeared. Those that I call friends are those who, at the very least, have my number on their mobile, or have me on Multiply or Friendster. Other than the occasional 'hi's and 'bye's, or the occasional, 'Hey bro, you free? I need your help.', I almost never get the 'Hey bro, you free? Let's meetup for coffee' kind of message/call.
Not that I am complaining. I mean, I'm happier spending time with my baby rather than to spend time with friends who call me out only when they need my help. My wife is different. She is not as sociable and not as friendly as I am. Unlike me, she can't strike up a conversation with someone she barely knows. She does, however, have 2 groups of friends whom she meets up with on a fairly regular basis. 2 friends from her secondary school and 4 from her workplace whom she is especially close to. of her 4 friends from her workplace, 1 is married, while the other 3 are still single. Of the 3 singletons, 1 of them seem to be drifting away, while the other 2 maintains close contact with her.
Having met her workplace friends quite often, I have grown to know them personally. The friend who is married is now mother of three and a full-time housewife. My wife and her 2 friends have always seen the married one as the luckiest. Loving husband, 3 lovely kids, a nice flat and a car. What more could a woman ask for, right?? Recently, it seems, that their marriage is on the rocks and heading towards divorce. Vaguely, I know that the husband has found another woman. Surprising, very surprising indeed. He's always seemed like a faithful husband. He's not that handsome and neither is he filthy rich. So it came as a surprise to us all.
It's very sad to hear of this development, seeing how she has stopped working to become a fulltime housewife and devoting herself to him and their family, only to have that devotion betrayed by his infidelity. Personally, the D-word did cross my mind at some points in my life, especially when I thought that our relationship had broken down irretrievably. I mean, I admit that there were times when I thought I could no longer live with her or her family members. However, at no point did I ever consider having another woman.
Invariably, just when we thought life could not be any better, it takes a plunge downhill. And when it seems there can be no light at the end of that dark tunnel, a tiny ray of light peeks through. I have never doubted our individual strengths as human beings, and the wonders the body can do when the mind is focused. Thus, I'm sure my wife's friend would come out of this stronger and a better person. I do pray for her happiness as well as her other friends'.
The same goes to my friends, whoever and wherever they may be. I'm always there for them. Be it a loan, help with their car or just a listening ear when you think you've reached the lowest ebb of your life, I'll help where I can..........even if you don't intend to ask me out for a drink anytime soon.
Cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
That speech.............
I guess the big news this past day or so has been the PM's speech at the National Day Rally. Admittedly, I have never been one to watch the Rally on TV, often preferring other programs, or playing games on my PC if there are no other more interesting shows. Since I started working, that changed. I, as do many Singaporeans, wait with bated breath, all the while hoping for more handouts and goodies to be announced.
We Singaporeans are a strange bunch. We clap our hands at the announcements made by the PM on the various plans they have in place for us. We nod our heads in apparent agreement at the slides and the graphs, trying to make sense of the facts and figures being put before us and yet, at the same time, we dismiss the policies being put forth as money politics from the government. I admit, I'm one of them. I'm happy at the measures that affect me and my family directly (extended maternity leave, more child-care leave, more child-care centers and more subsidy for them). However, I cringe when it is put to us that in fact we are saving more than we think with all the policies already in place.
While I agree that the reduction in road tax covers the increase in ERP, more for some than for others, they are 2 totally different things. Road-tax is paid yearly or half-yearly. Many car owners, set aside a part of their AWS or bonus for this purpose. As such we don't feel the savings when we do pay the road tax. But any increase in ERP is immediately felt as we pay as we use.
Then again, personally, I feel that if one gripes too much about the increasing ERP, it probably means he or she shouldn't be driving especially if the $100 or so increase in ERP really does affect his monthly budget. Yes, I'm unhappy about the ERP increase, but I'm not changing my driving habits just so that I could save $0.50 here and $0.20 there. Heck, I'm not about to skip a "McHappy Meal" like Hitler does and neither would I switch to a BMX any time in future.
Enough griping from me for now. It won't changed the fact that we, as consumers will always be at the mercy of the producers. It's all politics.
Talking about politics, the stories coming out from across the causeway is really making me have a good laugh. Where else would you get religion, politics and sleaze all rolled into one soap opera for the masses? All the talk of reformasi reform if you'd prefer is thoroughly overshadowed by charges of sodomy. 10 years on since the last sodomy charge levelled against Anwar Ibrahim, nothing much has changed. Personally, I find it hard to believe that a 23 year old man can succumb and allow himself to be sodomised by a 61 year old man. I mean it does take some force, if indeed the act did take place, to strip a young physically able man down without his consent and make him bend over, especially if the one doing the forcing is 61 years old. Anwar must have been working out real good.
For all the talk of change by the Malaysian government to appease the populace, nothing has really improved. Really. What change is there when the traffic cops on the north south highway still ask for RM50 to settle what they claimed was speeding by predominanly Singapore cars? More on that at another time. There are more important things in life and I think one of them is that Izzati needs a younger sibling........
We Singaporeans are a strange bunch. We clap our hands at the announcements made by the PM on the various plans they have in place for us. We nod our heads in apparent agreement at the slides and the graphs, trying to make sense of the facts and figures being put before us and yet, at the same time, we dismiss the policies being put forth as money politics from the government. I admit, I'm one of them. I'm happy at the measures that affect me and my family directly (extended maternity leave, more child-care leave, more child-care centers and more subsidy for them). However, I cringe when it is put to us that in fact we are saving more than we think with all the policies already in place.
While I agree that the reduction in road tax covers the increase in ERP, more for some than for others, they are 2 totally different things. Road-tax is paid yearly or half-yearly. Many car owners, set aside a part of their AWS or bonus for this purpose. As such we don't feel the savings when we do pay the road tax. But any increase in ERP is immediately felt as we pay as we use.
Then again, personally, I feel that if one gripes too much about the increasing ERP, it probably means he or she shouldn't be driving especially if the $100 or so increase in ERP really does affect his monthly budget. Yes, I'm unhappy about the ERP increase, but I'm not changing my driving habits just so that I could save $0.50 here and $0.20 there. Heck, I'm not about to skip a "McHappy Meal" like Hitler does and neither would I switch to a BMX any time in future.
Enough griping from me for now. It won't changed the fact that we, as consumers will always be at the mercy of the producers. It's all politics.
Talking about politics, the stories coming out from across the causeway is really making me have a good laugh. Where else would you get religion, politics and sleaze all rolled into one soap opera for the masses? All the talk of reformasi reform if you'd prefer is thoroughly overshadowed by charges of sodomy. 10 years on since the last sodomy charge levelled against Anwar Ibrahim, nothing much has changed. Personally, I find it hard to believe that a 23 year old man can succumb and allow himself to be sodomised by a 61 year old man. I mean it does take some force, if indeed the act did take place, to strip a young physically able man down without his consent and make him bend over, especially if the one doing the forcing is 61 years old. Anwar must have been working out real good.
For all the talk of change by the Malaysian government to appease the populace, nothing has really improved. Really. What change is there when the traffic cops on the north south highway still ask for RM50 to settle what they claimed was speeding by predominanly Singapore cars? More on that at another time. There are more important things in life and I think one of them is that Izzati needs a younger sibling........