Courting a political issue.

In my gloom, I still found some of the things taking place around me relatively humourous especially, the going-ons in the Elections. To think that we, humans would learn from past lessons, yet committing the same exact errors. Now, I'm really laughing. Here's how I see it.

We, the post-independence generation, have been clamouring for more freedom, more options and choices and a greater say in how the society we live in is shaped and moulded. We have been dreaming of the day where we could say what we want without reprisals, though that's a long time to come yet. I mean, let's be real, where else in the world could you find opposition politicians either bankrupted or serving time?

No, I'm not pointing fingers at anyone here, least of all, the ruling party. It's not their fault that these politicians have nothing else better to do than defame the powers that be. This happens, oh-so-often, too often, in fact. It makes me disillusioned like many young Singaporeans. It's like the same old song and dance being replayed at every General Elections. Opposition says somethings, ruling party not happy, lawsuits starts and someone is forced to apologise or else, made a bankrupt.

A decade ago, it was JB Jeyaratnam or JBJ as we affectionately call him. Here was a forceful personality with the heart of a lion. I liked him. Then, he began mouthing off and landed in the docks and made a bankrupt. Only time I met him eye to eye was at Golden Shoe, Raffles Place where he mugged me. Actually, he was trying to sell his book, or autobiography. Then i thought to myself, is this what happens to opposition politicians when the dust settles? The last time round it was Dr Chee Soon Juan, he mouth off too much and he is still a bankrupt now that he can't contest this time, or so I thought.

Just when it was thought to be a clean election this time, I mean no defamatory lawsuits, Dr Chee mouthed off again despite not being able to contest this time. As if that weren't enough, he brought his whole party into the mud. I mean, after 40 years of independence and a whole new generation of young leaders breaking through, one would think that the opposition has evolved and grown competent. I guess, perhaps not. I am no longer intrigued by the opposition, it will take more than just an alternative voice in Parliament to make me more interested.

Going by the antics and shennanigans going on like a circus everytime a General Election is called, it aint happening anytime soon. If anyone says the opposition are making waves, I'd just say that they don't qualify as waves, heck, they are not even causing a ripple.

Being judged

I think you are just being petty.
It's a nomal masochistic thing for you isn't it?
If you give a particular advice yet you do the opposite, what kind of message are you sending?

Ever had words such as those above thrown your way? I have. I bear no grudge or residual ill-feelings. I mean, at a low ebb, you pour your heart out to someone, you have to expect mud-slinging out in the open. There's just something about us, humans, being judgemental with one another. Hey, I do that myself. I guess subconciously we are all like that, hard wired into us that we have to judge one another no matter how hard we try to deny that fact.

I won't deny that I deserved that last riposte. I mean like I said in my previous posts, while I can give advice or points of view to those who asks for it, I have this innate inability to see things from other angles when it comes to my own problems. I think a lot of us have this one-dimensional problem. We tend to see things from a certain angle - the angle which we perceive to be correct at the expense at all others. Which is why we share our problems with close confidants in a bid to see things from a different perspective.

Sometimes, we don't get what we are looking for and there are times when we get more than what we bargained for. Good advice normally comes from those who have experienced it and resolved it. We normally try to draw parallels between the problems being confided to us and the experiences we have had. Then, we dish out the advice depending on what we think is the right thing to do, which may or may not be the right words the friend may want to hear, but we do it anyway, perceiving it to be the right thing to do. But is it?

It's not as easy as it seems. I guess, on one hand, not sharing your problems and keeping to yourself would self-detrimental. People have committed suicide just because they can't deal with their problem. At the same time, when we open our hearts out to some, we get judged and worse, stigmatised, especialy if the person you are confiding with, is facing similar problems themselves. It's a double-edged sword really. It all depends on how mentally strong we are. Had I been weak-minded, I'd have had myself shot or jumped of the top of DBS Tower.

As it stands, I'm not weak-minded, just that some problems really does wreak havoc within me. Especially the chronic ones.

is it worth it anymore?

I had this sense of deja vu; it's like troubles dun seem to end, they seem to pile up. More problems? What's new? Let's just wallow in self-pity. Times like these really did make the barrel of a loaded gun seems like a nice propects. At least with a squeeze of the trigger, my troubles would end, then again, so would my life.

I'm not elaborating the all the juicy details but it's suffice to say that it really tore me to pieces. Hurt so bad I thought of just leaving everything behind and go away for a little while. Fact is I didn't. Stayed back and tried to work it out. It wasn't pretty though. How could a relationship that lasted for so long suddenly go awry?

People say, and I believe that you must love the one you marry. Simply because you made that choice. Yeah, I made that choice and I don't regret it. I mean there were the good times to cherish but there were the bad ones to go with it. Honestly, though, ours wasn't rosy from the beginning. I still remember the day I was invited over to her elder brother's house when we first started dating, thinking it was gonna be nice since he invited me, he could only want to get to know me. So there I was in his house, on the receiving end of a lecture about not riding a motorbike when going out with my then-girlfriend. I mean, had I taken notes, I could have completed a thesis.

Of course, there was the dad. I mean which father wouldn't be sceptical of any guy who wants to date his daughter. Boy, I had a torrid time. Anyone who's tried making sceptical future father-in-law like you can attest to that. But it happened, how, I have no idea. Then there was the episode where we nearly broke up during engagement because she could not get along with my family, not because my family didn't welcome her, which they did, but more because she felt like a lesser person in the company of my family. That took a lot of talking and coaxing.

A friend said to me it could be just me over-reacting and that it could be possible that I didn't appreciate her enough or gave her enough emotional support. Then, I asked myself if I have done enough or have done too little to make her happy. I was tired of having to pick up the pieces of the tantrums that was being thrown. I was beginning to ask if I had the mental capacity to take more, to keep on picking up the pieces.

For now, I think I have.

Think politics

Elections are here!! Parliament has been dissolved and we are voting on 6th May. Just what he hell am I so excited about. Smart move by the government to declare Election Day on a Saturday, companies would not have to compensate for the public holiday.

Anyway, this recent uproar about young Singaporeans being rude and ungrateful really has been a major talking point. It all stemmed from that dialogue with our MM Lee Kuan Yew. 10 young adults were on TV the other day shooting questions at the old man, and boy, they asked some really hot questions. I mean here was a man, who is practically the founding father of modern Singapore, the man who led Singapore from a backwater island-nation to one of the most respected in the world and they were questioning, hounding him like a pack of hungry wolves as a radio deejay put it this morning.

I, for one, didn't think they were rude, aggressive, yes, rude was a bit rough to label them. Think of it this way, all of the panelist were born after independence and most didn't go through the tough formative years of the nation, then again, neither did I. I mean the old man was a tiger back then, he had to be. Almost everyone wanted him to fail. The older generations were respectful to the point of fearful of the politcal power he held. Those born in the 70s and 80s saw a more mellow side of him as most political opponents were bankrupt (JB Jeyaratnam) or in jail. I would not say he was a despot though he did rule with an iron fist and I understand why.

While it was refreshing seeing the young taking on the founding father, it did ruffle some feathers in the way they approached the whole episode. In fact, some have even gone as far as labeling them as rude. Well, as some of the ministers who spoke out have highlighted, it is sign of the change in mindset and how the young are now more open and dare to bring up and debate issues which affect their lives. Compare this with the mindset of yesteryears of confirmity and obedience without questioning, I'd rather be able to have my say than follow the herd. Think wildebeest.

I am thinking.....

I have been thinking a lot lately. Thinking too much it's driving me nuts. No, it's not some problem with the in-laws or anything like that. Fact is, I can't be bothered with them anymore, I just let it be. I know somethings bothering me, but I can't just figure out what. Peace of mind is a commodity which I lack right now. I honestly don't know what is bothering me.

Anyway, the supposedly long weekend flashed by so quickly, I didn't know it was there. Well, Friday was full of nothingness, just stayed home, doing a bit of spring cleaning, played my new game - The Battle for Middle Earth. Went to visit my FIL at his work place. He's a security guard in Tuas, working the night shift and thru the weekends that wifey and me never get a chance to see him unless we go there. Then, we went to a BBQ at East Coast, organised by some friends. Sunday, went for our usual classes in the morning followed by going to 2 friends house who were having a cukur rambut ceremony for the newborns. For the uninitiated, that means, literally, hair shaving ceremony.

Something happened over the weekend which really ruffled me up. I was having a good time at the BBQ. I'm the kind of person who loves to work the grill. I'm at the grill at almost every BBQ I go to. In fairness, my wife did warn me against leaving her by herself, knowing how I'd get so engrossed from working the grill. Suffice to say, I heeded the warning only initially. Hey, I was enjoying myself. So, she left and waited in the car at the car park. While I thought she was socialising with the gals, she conveniently left the BBQ and sat in the car, reading the newspapers. I understood why she did that, and honestly, I felt terrible.

Now, most people would say, Why on earth did u leave ur wife by herself, knowing she's not the most sociable person around?. Yeah, I admit it was foolish of me to think a leopard could change it's spots. And it becomes my fault for wanting to get my wife to learn to be more sociable. Well, she left the party and stayed in the car, without telling me. Next thing I knew she wasn't there and saw an SMS from her that she's in the car. An SMS! I only saw that SMS 30mins after it was sent, meaning that she's been there for that long.

You'd think I'd have no right to be pissed. Consider this though, if something were to happen to a wife while she was out with the husband, who'd be responsible then? I don't have a problem if she can't get along and she wants to leave, what I had a problem with was for her to leave without telling me first.

Let's stamp out idiotic parkers!

Those of you who have followed my blog since its inception, a whole 3 mths ago, would know by now that my pet peeve is inconsiderate bahaviour. Like the inconsiderate drivers, inconsiderate people yapping on their phones loudly and the ones in front of you on the escalator going up who purposely fart in your face when your mouth is open. If that doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth, I don't wanna know what would.

Well, I have been visiting this particular blog, and I must say, the owner is doing a hell of a job, so I thought I'd be a little helpful and mention his blog in mine so that my current readership of 3 could pass it on to their friends. Perhaps, we could spread the joy and the word of this valiant deed to rid the world, or at least our little red dot of one such inconsiderate behaviour. Lo and behold, parkingidiots.blogspot.com.

First time I saw this blog, I had a hard time pulling a straight face, it's just so damn funny how some people who have the mental capacity to work out the moolah need to own a car in Singapore but lack the social grace to park properly causing a great deal of inconvenience to other road users. Quite simply, inconsiderate. It's a very perplexing issue, to own a car in Singapore you do need quite a bit of cash seeing how expensive it is to be driving, and moolah doesn't come easily. Put it simply, the ones who own a car are those who have a good job and/or a good education.

Strange isn't it that we strive so hard to improve our social standing and our financial clout but we fail to improve on basic courtesy and social grace even after our government has been preaching this for years. With better education and a dash of public-spiritedness, it might happen, but being Singaporeans bred on the mantra, "Do what you want, just don't get caught", it'd take probably another generation for this to sink in. It's a sad situation, they are smart enough to learn how to drive but stoop to such lows in parking.

Personally, I have come across such indiscrimiate parking countless times, too many for me to count anymore. With this site, My K750i will come in handy to snap photos such as those featured and post it in that blog. The Parking Idiot labels would come in handy should I be in a mood to slap it on the errant vehicle. This ought to be fun.

Stumbled? Dust yourself off and get on with it

I'm so sleepy and groggy from lack of sleep, cough syrup and flu tablets. Then again, there's a job that remains to be done. My blog needed some attenton, so here I am, eyebags, runny nose, itchy throat and all.

Why the lack of sleep? Attended to a small emergency yesterday night. A friend called me up needing to talk, tears notwithstanding. She was having some problems at home. It's kinda complicated, you see, her husband also happens to be one of my best buddies, she, I treat like a sister. Thing is, I've known both for a long time, my buddy for over a decade, the wife almost a deacde, way back while we were all in school. In fact, it was my big-mouth which hooked them up. Not that they were protesting. Well, I had good intentions and their well-being at heart. I mean, knowing how they were and the fact that they did like each other, made it easy for them to hook up.

Anyway, she was in tears yesterday when she SMSed me, so I called and heard her practically in tears. So, I met up with her, she lived only a few blocks away. As usual, I gave her a listening ear, I'm pretty good at this, and offered my views, but it seemed a bit futile knowing that the source of the problem was not her. In order to solve a problem, it has to be nipped in the bud. In the end, I sent her home to her younger sister's place, whose husband is another buddy of ours, yeap my 2 best buddies married sisters. Her husband walked out of their home and did not leave a message and did not bring his handphone, rendering him uncontactable for the night. So, I thought it best that she have some company for the night.

I went home thinking about this whole thing - this whole marriage thing. It's not the easiest thing to do, but everyone wants a a shot at it. Some work, others fail. But the one thing that separates success and failure in any relationship is the desire and commitment to make it work. Without it, a couple might as well call it quits. Then, the question arises, What do you do then, if your partner is unwilling to put in as much commitment and desire to make it work?

Honestly, I am not trained to handle such questions, I'm not a professional counsellor but, every so often, we find ourselves faced with such problems befalling our colleagues, friends or relatives. Speaking from the little experience I have, it's all up to the individual, when and how to end a relationship is a desicion best taken without coercion. Third party views, more often than not, only stirs up the mud in an already murky water. The ASEAN policy of non-intervention, is a good policy to adhere to in such situations.

As much as we want to help our friends, the best help we can give them is the peace of mind to handle such problems. Life is all about the journey, sometimes we stumble and fall flat on our face. If we keep depending on others to help us up all the time, when the time comes to pick ourselves up, without any help, we might be found wanting. I'm always there for my friends to lend a listening ear, a helping hand and a shoulder to cry on, but I will never point them the direction they have to take - that's up to them.

Mouthing off....

I hate it when I'm under the weather. Now I'm hvaing a terrible cough and really bad bout of flu. The cough's been bugging me for a week now. Been holding back from taking MC - not such a good thing to do when you work under someone else. You never know when the MC will haunt you back.

Well, I had a company retreat, way out in Malacca - Hotel Equatorial. Not the most ideal of locations, but hey, the company's paying. I decided to take a road trip rather than take the company provided transport - read, bus. A colleague of mine wanted to tag along, well, I wasn't about to say no, any company for the 200km trip is welcome. There's just something about roadtrips that really gets me going. Something about long drives that challenges me. Makes it a whole lot of fun to go thru.

Guess what? Some of my friends were so intrigued by the Air Papan Beach that they wanted to go there, with me leading the convoy. Wow, that's a first. I'm not complaining..... another road trip? Honey, let's start packing. Dates not confirmed yet.

I commented to my wife that I am beginning to develop an acid tongue when it comes to my BILs. Just yesterday my MIL came over with my niece in tow. She left at 10.20pm. Well, me and my wife decided to send her home, seeing how late it was. Then, she said to drop her off at this particular bus stop and she'll take the bus home from there. Then it happened, I mouthed off!

MIL: Just drop me off at the bus stop outside, I'll take service XXX home.
Me: Mom, if I were my bro-in-law, then I'd do that or probably just give you enough money to cover your cab fare. As it is, I'm not, so I'm sending you home.

Her home was just a 10mins drive from my place. So to drop her off in the middle of nowehere was the last thing on my mind. On the way back, I said to my wife, I had half a mind to continue what I said and say that if I were my 2nd BIL, I would have asked her to buy some food for me and my wife while she's on the way there. But I am not them. No, I'm not blowing my own trumpet, I just wanted to let my MIL know that in spite of what her own sons are doing to her, I won't allow her to be neglected as long as I am alive and married to her daughter. Well, my wife whipped up a delicious meal of fried bee hoon yesterday.

Well, I know I am not exactly the best husband or son-in-law, at least I have shown that I will not fall to the depths of ineptitude as shown by those who should be setting a good example. While humility has never been one of my greatest attributes, it's not the worst either.

Much ado about nothing....

Sometimes I just hate the world I live in. Yesterday, on the way home, was another example. My wife and I were listening to our favourite program on the evening drive home. As usual, we looked forward to the normal banter and, inevitable, wisecracks the deejays would, errr, crack. Somehow, the mood was slightly subdued with one deejay having to hold back his words and usual demeanour in the name of good broadcasting.

It all started the day before when he remarked that he could make a killing by selling condoms at night along that stretch of driveway along East Coast Park, I'm sure most locals would know where. Then, there was some more remarks about the extra-curricular activities going on there. Well, a civic-minded listener concerned at what was perceived by him/her as distasteful shennanigan wrote in a letter/email speaking up against those comments made by the deejay. This is what I have an issue with.

I'm pretty sure the deejays here in Singapore are mature, responsible adults. With the many government agencies regulating the dos and don'ts, there is as much chance as something vulgar hitting the airwaves as Singapore winning the FIFA World Cup. A few years ago, a deejay was fired for saying something racy on air and talked about some very personal issues which shouldn't be on air. I'd assume the deejays and the radio stations are very much aware of their responsibilities.

I mean, c'mon, it's entertainment after all. Don't tell me that you believe everything you see on TV to be real. That would be naive, nay, I'd call that ignorance. In any case, we are spoilt for choice in terms of radio channels, just change the channel and get on with your hermit of a life. Let's be real, every radio channel in Singapore has it's target audience. This particular station has the young, working adults who grew up on the 80s and 90s music as it's base audience, who are now matured 20-somethings. I'm pretty sure we all know where that stretch of road is and what goes on at night. There is no need to protect us.

It's never about what you see or hear that matters anyway, it's what you choose to believe. If you want to have entertainment in your life, take it with a pinch of salt. Not everything you see or hear is real or to be taken at face value.

The weekend that passed.

I was reading through my previous posts, and it occured to me, I was beginning to turn into a psuedo socio-geopolitical expert trying to solve the world's problem. Honestly, I was just venting my frustrations at what I see. Yeah, I am passionate about these things. Oh well, ablog ain't enough to solve the problems afflictuing us all.

I brought dear wifey to a place she has been pestering me to go to eversince we got the car - Air Papan Beach. Where?? It's about 5km after the Mersing, just follow the road that goes to Kuantan after passing by the Mersing roundabout and you'll find a right turn into Air Papan. We almost went there during last December but somehow, we went to Cherating instead with a couple of my friends. The reason why I have been putting off her requests was because I didn't think too much of the place - I just didn't rate it. I had this vision of a really kampung setting with lots of fishing boats - really quaint, sort of, and a not-so-spectacular beach.

Anyway, I decided to take her there on Saturday after we went to service our car. The trip was uneventful, except for the heavy rain that fell part of the way. After the right turn past Mersing, we were greeted by paddy fields on the left and beautiful kampung scenery, ah, the fresh air. I just had to wind down the windows and let the fresh air envelope us, instead of the air-conditioning. After another 2-3km of winding kampung road, we reached the beach. The scenery preceeding the beach did little in giving me clues of the scenery which awaited us both. Best part of it all, my wife has never been there nor seen pictures of it, but was quite adamant that we make our way there after listening to some colleagues who could not stop talking about it. It was spectacular!!

We spent about 3hrs there, from 3pm to 6pm, before the rain we thought we had left behind en route, caught up with us. She had some fun playing in the waters, while I stayed dry and took some beautiful photos of the place. She couldn't resist it, the waves were not strong, compared to Cherating, partly because of the many islands protecting that little stretch of beach. All in all, it was a pleasant surprise. Now, I can't stop thinking of that place. Planning to go there again sometime this month and staying there for 1 night.

We stopped over at the new Tebrau City shopping mall. This is a nice place. Very modern and chic, unlike those normal warehouse-like shopping malls like JB Southern City aka Extra or the various Giant malls. This was a multi-storey complex, complete with various foodie joints and other shops, plus the Jusco Hypermart at one end. Well, enjoy the photos below......

Raining on the way there

The paddy fields, I think..

The beach...

Islam with an agenda......

Lately, there has been this big hoohah about Islam and its views on apostasy. A lot has been said about this topic that I cant help butting in - with my considerable bum and girth - and air my thoughts.I had a great little conversation about this with dear friend of mine who's teaching in Medan, Indonesia. Yeap, the very same one affected by the tusnami back in Dec 26 2004.

Despite what I said about the superpowers putting their noses where it don't belong, I do think it is a basic human right for any human to choose his/her religion. So why the uproar over apostasy in Islam? This is because all the schools of jurispudence in Islam are unanimous that the punishment for apostasy in Islam is death. This law punishment was laid out by out great prophet Muhammad PBUH when he said that if a Muslim were to foresake his religion, he is to be killed. However, at the same time, many scholars also agree that there is nothing in the holy book, the Al-Quran, that prescribes worldly punishments for apostasy.

I am not an Islamic scholar, and not about to pretend or act like one. Fact is, we treat our prophet and the Al-Quran with utmost respect and reveration. Deep inside every Muslim is that strong desire to be a martyr, to be guaranteed a place in paradise. With such deep-rooted emotions, anything - any words, actions or even insinuations - against our prophet and the holy book is taken as direct slap in the face of each and every Muslim, thus the outpouring of anger everytime it happens. Admittedly, some take it abit too far resulting in unnecessary deaths in riots and demonstrations.

Back to the furore regarding apostasy, we have to understand the complex nature of Islam. Islam is an inifite religion, always relevant, flexible and always accomodating. Islam believes that there is no compulsion in religion (written in Al-Quran) there is no coercion whatsoever. Some people have called apostasy as akin to high treason. Personally, I do not believe so. While the prophet said that any Muslim who apostates must be killed, we have to understand the reasons for that ruling. For, while it is stated in the Hadith or traditions of the prophet, it was not stated anywhere in Al-Quran.

In its infancy, Muslims numbered less than a few hundred. In fact, the spreading of Islam was, initially, done discreetly, for fear of persecution from the local Meccan authorities. When Muhammad PBUH emigrated to Madinah, he was embraced by the locals and they embraced Islam. The Meccans harassed the fledgling Muslim city-state, fighting several vicious wars and many other skirmishes. While the Muslims accepted new Muslim converts into their fold with open arms, there were cases whereby their supposed allies and supposed Muslim brethren became turncoats and forsaked Islam causing deaths of many Muslims. It was in this state of war that it was declared by Muhammad PBUH that any apostate be killed.

Now, the same laws are being invoked but it bears no relavance anymore, in the sense that the context has changed. While Islam remains relevant, some of its laws have eveolved to adapt to the changing times and mindsets. While it was acceptable to kill for revenge then, it is no longer true now. Islam is no longer at war and fighting for its survival. Take for example, the banning of headscarves in many secular schools around the world - not only in France. While Islam dictates that girls who have reached puberty must cover themselves when in the presence of ther men, it becomes faux pas to insist on wearing the headscarf if wearing it means forsaking racial harmony and stability.

Many a time, Islamic words, symbols and laws of years gone by have been taken out of context. The greatest example would be jihad. Jihad literally means struggle, the struggle of one person against his demons is his own perconal jihad, but some have chosen to use the meaning as armed struggle and holy war. It's just that meaning of jihad has been twisted to suit the needs of those with an agenda, one which suits their twisted minds. What's so holy about killing oneself in order to kill many innocent civilians?

I'm not rejecting the fatwa of the scholars and the Syariah Laws that govern us as Muslims, what I reject is the actions of the discerning few who have an agenda and invoking laws, putting their agenda gains ahead of social stability and racial harmony.

Superpowers?? They aren't that super in my books

Well, this is unprecedented on my part. 2 posts in 1 day. Actually, the post preceding this was written yesterday, just that I didn't post it straightaway. Remember my previous post about the Afghan guy who stands accused of apostasy and has probably a noose hanging around his neck already?

Well, it seems that the Afghan judiciary has decided to release him. My guess is that decision was taken, thanks to, in no small measure, the overwhelming pressure from the countries who have "liberated" Afghanistan. Liberation from what?Liberation from living under the rule of God? Colonials have reared its ugly head once again. Only this time, they don't go about conquering other nations directly, but put these nations under so much pressure they readily subjugate.

Think about it, Afghanistan was a peaceful country inhabited by wandering nomads whose only purpose was to live according to how their God and Prophet had instructed them to. Living the simple life and being simple people, was not so simple after all. Alexander The Great had a crack at it, so did the Mongols. Then in AD 642, the Arabs came and introduced Islam, perhaps the one lasting impression from all those centuries of wars. The Soviets were the last to try. Not much success there. In all the confusion, a small band of freedom fighters who live by the book and implement the Sharia Laws (Islamic law) to the letter. They called themselves the Taliban. Initially, they were accepted and embraced. They then became reclusive and shut itself from the outside world.

Now, we have the USA and UK trying to dictate, in no certain terms, to the newly-formed Afghan government how to lead it's people. How to live their lives. I repeat my question, who gave them the right to decide what is right and what is wrong? The Americans, the so-called protectors of humanity, the so-called superpower, invaded Afghanistan with the pretext of ridding the world of tyranny. I wonder just who is the tyrant here, forcing its ideologies on the others, making others subjugate to him, either through brute force or through political pressure.

It's no wonder that Western powers are reviled in most Middle-Eastern communities. From the jungles of Vietnam to the shores of Libya to the deserts of Afghanistan and Iraq, their interventions have not only increased hostilities and anger towards the American government, but also to its people in general. I know that I sound very passionately against, to the brink of fanaticsm, of Western policies, but the truth is, if American pressure extended to China in forcing their ideologies on an admittedly Communist country, I'd very much feel against it.

No one has the right to force anyone else to believe in something or to disbelieve in something else. Isn't that one of the basis of human rights? Why then does the Western powers, the USA specifically, insist on forcing it's ideologies of democracy on the rest of the world? Being a nation who supports terrorism (read: creation of Israel), being a nation who cares little for collateral damage (read: Vietnam War) and being a nation without regards for international consensus and believing in the legitimacy of unilateral action (read: Iraq Invasion and Kyoto accords for greenhouse emissions) is not the kind of portfolio one would expect from a nation which regards itself as the protectors of humanity.

Winning the 2 World Wars almost single-handedly, while a great and remarkable achievement does not make one the perpetual protectors to everything living.

Let's elect our voice in Parliament

General Elections. Yeap, another round of walkovers, landslide PAP victories and a few more battles in some constituencies. Having been in power, since before I was born, success for PAP shows no signs of abating yet. At least not while Singapore remains safe and clean and the economy thrives. Success breeds success they say.

Honestly, I feel as though half the nation is just going through the motions. It's not that there is no opposition, Probably, just a lack of credible ones. Having a 1-party government for decades, means that most of us never knew what a credible opposition in the government could bring. Heap that with the conformist attitudes that are so prevalent amongst the locals, means, the opposition may not get much of a sniff at winning. I'm not shooting down the opposition before the battle has begun. But apart from the opposition controlled constituencies, not much else can be seen on the ground to garner votes and to sway those on the fences.

One of the key contention points in every GE is upgrading. It seems that those constituencies who vote for the opposition gets pushed down the pecking order for any estate upgrading. It's a carrot that has always been promised by the ruling PAP. I don't get it, are such upgrading supposed to be a reward for putting the PAP in power and a punishment for putting the opposition in power? While the elder statesmen, Mr Lee Kuan Yew and Mr Goh Chok Tong spoke of the need for a credible opposition, it's either the opposition are not strong enough to put up a credible challenge or they don't do enough to canvass the populace for votes.

Granted that the policies put in place by the government are mostly spot-on. I mean, we have amongst the smartest people in the world, Math Olympiad anyone? However, we are not the most innovative, creative and proactive. We'd rather sit and wait and take what's given and silently complains when things are taken. Who could blame us? Raised on a diet of fed propaganda, numerous social campaigns and countless policies that defines how we live, it's little wonder that we have raised more machines than humans. Let's face it; it is socially unacceptable to be a failure in school. How many of those who were condemned early in their education as failures managed to get themselves out of that rut?

Think the Speak Good English, Courtesy and many other campaigns. While the purpose is to educate the public, it also forces those ideologies on us. Should it matter that we don't speak good english when we have little interaction with foreigners? While it's stereotypical, it's also true that those who don't speak good english has little contact with "angmohs". They don't run global empires or MNCs. They are just simple people eking out a living to fulfil their basic needs. While the various campaigns and policies have mostly hit the targets, it has also made us a society afraid to think out of the box and to voice out our opinions. All thanks to decades of being told how to live our lives.

Now, I'm sounding like an armchair politician. I can't help it when it bugs me. Think I'll just adopt the nationally accepted approach to politics and life in general - wait and see.

Don't poke ur nose where it doesn't belong.

Dammitt!!! The weekend's coming to a close now. I still have yet to shake of my lethargy from my mental exertions. How did my weekend go?? Apart from not being able to rest that much due to attending to some requests for help from my customers and my car having a flat tyre , it went extremely well.

Yeah, I do a bit of freelancing, helping some self-confessed PC-illiterate families with their computers, for a small fee, of course. Actually, I do pity them in the sense that they got young school-going kids who will definitely need internet access and they can't do much to assist their own kids. That's where I come in. Apart from setting up their computers and networks, I teach them basic PC and Internet knowledge. I try to give them their money's worth and explain all available options, it's up to them to decide their preferred course of action for me to implement. It's not that difficult explaining all the technical jargon in layman terms.

Anyway, I was reading yesterday's papers and came face to face with a man whom I had never before seen, but whose life and future do affect me, in a way. He is a 41-year old Afghan man, born a Muslim and raised as a Muslim. At 25, he began working for a Christian missionary helping his community and he converted to Christianity. While it is seen as a basic human right in most parts of the world, Islam strictly dictates that a Muslim who renounces his Islamic faith is considered an apostate, something which is punishable by death in Islamic Law. Western media and their governemnts were quick to denounce the trial as a violation of the basic tenets of human rights - the right to choose.

Over the years, we have seen a lot of western provocation. Remember, US trying to influence Singapore not to cane Michael Fay? Remember Australia trying to intervene when an Australian model was caught trafficking drugs in Bali? Remember the US condemning Malaysia when Mahathir fired that rhetoric about Jews ruling the world by proxy? Has anyone forgotten the waging of the 2nd Gulf war on the premise that Saddam Hussein has stockpiles of WMD, without authorisation from the UN Security Council?? If this is not yet another example of Western provocation, then what is? They claim to live by the laws enshrined by their respective constitutions. They demand that their basic rights as a sovereign nation be respected. But can they claim to do the same for the rest of the world? Who or what gave them the autority to challenge or influence the rulings of the judiciary of another country?

OK, back to the Afghan guy. Now, here is a man, raised as a Muslim. He knows the consequences of his actions. He knows that the punishment for renouncing Islam and not repenting is death. Christianity is not something forced upon him. He embraced Christianity. In a way, he signed his own death warrant. He did choose. So, if the Afghan judiciary decide on death as his punishment, and rightly so, there is no one to blame but himself. If anyone were to ask me if I respected the Afghan man's basic human rights, I would only say, " Has those who denounce this ruling as a violation of human rights ever considered the human rights of those inmates in Guantanmo Bay, who are held indefinitely, without any charges pressed against them??"

I say, let the Afghans decide what to do with their country. Let them decide how they live. No human has the right to impose their views and way of life on another. Then again, what do those colonialist, who categorizes all whom do not observe their customs and way of life and savages, know about basic human right? They only care for their rights. Now, did I violate anyone's human rights??

Work, work, work!!

Well, it's been a really hectic past few days. Work has been sucking the life out of me, literally. It's not so much my work is physically taxing, far from it. My job revolves around my little cubicle, and basically staring into space, trying to find little holes in the wall that need plugging. Honestly, I wish I had such a job, preferably one which comes with a corner office overlooking the city or better still the wide blue yonder and that pays me more than I could use. I mean No amount of money is too little, ask Bill if you don't believe me.

Talking about Billy ole boy, he is tops again in the Forbes' rish list. His nett worth is probably more than the GDP of some of the developed nations. Obscene isn't it? In a world where half the population live in poverty, not knowing what a computer is, let alone know how to use it, I do find it obscene to be worth USD50 billion. What the heck is he ever gonna do with all that money. In fact, can anyone contemplate having USD50 billion in hard currency?? OK, he does donate, probably, close to 50% of his profits annually to charitable causes. I'm not against wealth accumulation, I'm all for it, I mean, who doesn't want to be able to say , "I got USD10,000 loose change, you want it?" Well, I'm dreaming again.

Seriously though, having to work for the rest of our lives is a stark reality we all have to face. Ole Billy boy still goes to work everyday, doesn't he? I guess he has my dream job. I have been doing a lot of calculations lately and somehow, it occured to me. I may never be able to retire. I'm 29 (ooppps, there goes the big secret), earning an average income, with a bank balance the size which a primary school kid would laugh at, car loan to repay and a housing mortgage which won't be fully repaid till I'm 56. Somehow, the maths don't add up. Anyone knows how I can get in touch with Billy??

Oh, back to my job. The thing about my job is that it's not most fun thing to do. I can't complain though, considering that I do make a decent living. Basically, my job entails clearing the mess left behind by others, namely my predecessor - not the easiest thing to do, considering I, initially, had an anally retentive boss. Things picked up after some reshuffle and my current boss took over. I was at my most productive, churning out reports, defining processes, drawing up the work instructions - fun ain't it??

Then along came the ISO audits. Those things really sap you. Having to go through tons of data, making sure everything is in place, every little detail is scrutinized and all actions accounted for is the most satisfying and gratifying part of my job. Cynical?? You think so??!?!?

Thank God, it's all over and done with. the auditors did not have much of a chance to scrutinize much anyway, all thanks to my big mouth. Pre-emptive strikes galore in the boardroom just now, I tell you. My brain was in overdrive, thinking of things they might ask and my mouth was spouting answers to the questions they were about to ask. Add in a little witty banter and a relaxed atmosphere, it all bode well. By the time the auditors were ready with their report, I was mentally drained. Thing is, I worked my ass of preparing for this, any Non-Compliance to any of the standards on my part would have been intolerable.

Well, the results were great. No Non-Complaince!! At least not for me!! Now where's my favourite pillow!

Commitmentphobia: Are you the factor?

Had another interesting conversation with yet another friend, who's yet another babe- maybe not supermodel material but definitely the kind I like. Ah, dun worry, I'm still aware, alive and thinking straight. I'm not about to go gallivanting - not that I could anyway - and chasing skirts.

Anyway, twas about the perennial problem most men have - fear of commitment, commitmentphobia. Well, she's with her boyfriend for 2 years now, they really do make a good couple and she feels he's the one. However, she has still to meet his mom and she has yet to get a chance to get closer to his family. Some of us realise that meeting the parents is as close as you get to walking down the isle or shaking hands with the kadi, depending on you faith of choice. She seems peeved at the fact that they have yet to move on to that other level after 2 years of courtship.

I do agree that we, men, are weird creatures. We can go into a shopping mall, buy the things we need and get out in 15 minutes. We don't spend 15 minutes in the toilet, powdering our noses or checking if we smell right. But we just get stumped sometimes when engagement or marriage comes into the picture. The thought of having to wake up next to the same person for the rest of our lives sometimes intimidate the most courageous men. Throw in the babies, diapers and naggy MILs, most men would run for cover.

Then again, I never had those thoughts. I didn't do most things most guys would, like party, hang out at their favourite haunts, checking out the ladies. Don't get me wrong, I did check out the skirts, just didn't indulge myself in all those foollery by wolf-whistling. I know I said I was in a bike gang before. Then again, I was called "Mr Cool". Most probably not because I was cool, but because I didn't like partaking in everything all the other guys did. They did go to discos and went for parties, they did get drunk, and man they did get laid. I was the guy who sat at the corner and observed the going-ons, much to my amusement, more often than not.

Ok back to my bewildered, frustrated and disappointed friend. I feel for her, I really do, though my evil twin is rubbing his hands in glee at the thought of her being single and available again. Seriously though, she complained about her boyfriend focusing too much at work and spends too little time with her. Initially, I thought that it was a trivial issue. I mean, he may be planning andworried about their future together and wants to make sure he could provide for her when they get married. It was only when she told me about his commitmentphobia that I understood her.

In a society, where a 6-month old relationship is perceived to be ripe, by the senior citizens standards, to be taken on to the next level, a 2 year relationship like her's may be viewed as past its sell-by date. It's not really a death sentence, I mean, she could call it quits anytime, but having put in so much effort, sweat and tears into this relationship without asking for anything much in return, she has a right to feel hard done by, no matter how much she loves him. As the song goes, "A car this fine, don't pass your way everyday....."

It's not so much about marrying the one you love but loving the one you marry. Somehow, that line just seems to echo much louder now.

Between fun and safety...

I remember a few days back listening to the radio on my way to work and the deejays were discussing about an underaged disco party which starts from 8.30pm till 4am in the morning. I'm not a party animal, in fact, I dun party. The only times I stepped into a nightspot was going to Hard Rock Cafe in KL and Singapore with friends and for a DnD. Yeap, as dumb as it sounds, my old company decided to have a DnD at Hard Rock Cafe Singapore. Suffice to say, I left as soon as the event was over.

Also recently, the Singapore Police Force (SPF) started routine checks on teenagers loitering in public areas after midnight or something like that. What are we trying to tell the young? It's ok to party till 4am but not to loiter after midnight? I guess the kids going to these parties need to have a written consent from their parents to be allowed entry or better still, they must be accompanied by an adult to be allowed entry.

Kids being kids, will always clamour for more freedom and trust from their parents. I was the same when I was a kid myself. The first time I went to catch a movie with friends was when I was doing my pre-university studies. That was when I got my motorcycle licence, after much clamouring, pleading and a little devious plan to go to the furthest school possible. Anyway, parents are unlikely to give that much freedom to their kids, not because they dun trust their kids, but probably out of concern and distrust of the world at large.

A friend of mine, wanted to take a trip up to Terengganu for a 2 days 1 night trip. In fact, the 4 of them had planned to take a road trip along the East Coast of Malaysia. All without knowing what the road conditions were like. When I drove up the Cherating last December, I had illusions that the road will be like 20 meters away from the beach from Mersing all the way up to Cherating. Boy, was I wrong. The first time I saw the beach and the sea was 50km from Kuantan. Most of the rest was lined up by trees on either side. Unlike the NS Highway, there were no real rest stops along the way, so we had to stop at the few roadside stalls selling drinks. Not the most sanitary ones you would find. Flies all over.

Anyway, I told her what to expect and did discourage her from the trip. It was too far and she had too little time to enjoy the trip, it would have been a waste. In any case, her mom wouldn't have allowed it. Call me sexist but I don't believe it's safe for a group of girls to go on such a long trip. I guess it's just my paternal instincts, but if my daughter wanted to go on a road trip anywhere outside of Singapore, I would have said no myself. Being young, idealistic and full of exuberance and enthusiasm, she was chaffed at my insinuations that girls need protection from the guys.

Well, like I said to her, statistics show that most robbers are men and most robbing victims are women. Same goes for sexual offences. Yeap, men are the bad guys, some, driven by the need to provide for their family, read women and children, and unable to do so, they turn to crime, knowing full well that they can easily prey on women. Some are just hedonistic. The fact is women are more susceptible to being victims of crime than men. Women claim to be just as strong and just as tough, but when push comes to shove, they are still the weaker sex. Those who want to dispute, answer this, why has there been no women contesting the World Heavyweight Boxing crown or why women can't match up to men in the 100 metres dash?

The bottomline is that most parents would rather have their children be safe and bored than have their children have a taste of life and be exposed to all the elements, bad ones notwithstanding.

The world is getting too twisted....even for me

Wow, It's been more than a week since my last post - my longest hiatus yet. Nooooo.....it's not that I have gotten tired of blogging my thoughts or that I have run out of material since I started my bitchfest. Actually, part of the reason is work, getting prepared for the ISO Audit - man, I hate those things. The other part is that I have been unable to blog due to some technical issues with the host. All's well now, thank goodness.

So what have we missed?? Hmmmmm......

The killer of the 2-yr old girl, Nonoi, whose disappearance brought out the best amongst Singaporeans. Come to think of it, her disappearance galvanised the immediate community to launch search parties and the general public offering moral support to her family. To the shock of those closest to the victim, the person responsible for her death was her own step-dad. Heck, I was caught by surprise myself. At the back of my partially-sordid mind, at best, I thought it was an uncle or some family friend. Well, I'm just waiting for the court case to start to find out more sordid details, in the meantime, my heart goes out to the family, distraught is too simple a word to describe their feelings rite now. God have mercy on her soul.

Oh, the killer of the businessman in the Serangoon shooting has also been caught. He was hiding out in KL waiting to make his way to Thailand, probably further, to any country with no extradition treaty with Singapore most probably. There was this other death of a young Vietnamese lady who was pushed or jumped out a high-floor, pretty much half-naked. The last bit of news these last few days took the cake. 4 malay guys allegedly staged a kidnapping of 2 Indonesian businessman out of some financial dispute. When I first heard the news, I thought to myself, are they crazy??

Apart from drug traficking and cold-blooded murder, kidnapping is another crime which warrants the death penalty. I could only hope that these misguided souls did not actually mean to kidnap for ransom, else, nothing short of a short drop and sudden stop awaits them.

On a much happier note, albeit, slightly sordid, on my part, Slobodan Milosevic is dead. It's a bit premature considering he was awaiting the International Tribunal to start proceedings against him for genocide. He was after all the "Butcher of the Balkan". The man who was, single-handedly and unrepentantly, a murderer of thousands of Croats and Bosnians, in the name of creating a single and powerful Serbian nation, "cleansed" of other races. Despite his single-mindedness and undoubted brutality, he was revered, or at the very least, admired, in his own country. I still find it difficult to understand how a mass-murderer such as him could be afforded a funeral worthy of a respected statesman and bereavement by the public in Serbia.

While I do admit I am a little sordid, taking into account I do look at grissly and gruesome pictures, ala "Faces of Death", I think it is overly-sordid to grieve the passing of a man who stands accused of genocide. Hmmmm, then again, it's not that out of place considering the twisted minds who run the most powerful nations in the world.

Getting of our bums...

Wow, I finally got that out of my system. Feels good, though, in retrospect, I realised that I shouldn't have publicly laid everything, well, almost everything, out in the open for everyone to read about them. It's not so much a tinge of regret that makes me re-evaluate why I posted those things about them because I feel I am justified in my anger. Rather it is a sense of self-respect, not my respect for them, cos it is negligible. Any self respecting person would know that such things are best to be kept within the confines of those involved but I never felt like I was welcome.

OK, enough already. I'm not taking my posts down. If, at any time, they gather enough inteligence to stumble upon this site, I'll just let them have a piece of my mind. Honestly, they do deserve this.

It dawned on me that the problem s I face are not atypical of the normal Malay family. Dr Mahathir wrote his book, The Malay Dilemma, in the hope of opening the eyes of his fellow Malays. A lot has been said to stereotype Malays as a lazy race. To a certain extent, this is true. I'm not going to hide from the truth just because I am a Malay. The fact of the matter is, I am, admittedly, lazy - when it comes to certain things. But when the proper motivation is there, the laziness vanishes.

Malays are not lazy, we are just easily-contented. That's why we are equally happy to be living in the city as we are living in the rural areas. But ask any Malay and they'll surely love to stay in a rural environment. I guess this all stems from our Muslim upbringing of being thankful to Allah for what we have. This is further exacerbated, by the typical laid-back attitude of the Malays. We seldom think far or plan ahead. Dr Mahathir saw this at an early stage of Malaysia's economic development and it, rightfully so, worried him.

Thankfully, the new generation of Malays include many visionaries who has long since elevated themselves and their thinking to a whole new different levels. Malays have always been a second class race when it comes to economics, but we are catching up with the rest. The presence of a brilliant few has provided fresh impetus for the younger generation to emulate them. Rather than have to fight for scraps as we did before, we are now fighting for a bigger sice of the pie. This could only bode well for the future of not only the Malays, but also for Singapore.

I just wish that more Malays would realise this and strive to to be a success instead of just sitting there, lamenting their luck and blaming it all on fate. Belief in fate without the sweat and tears will get one nowhere. Hope my bro-in-laws realises this.

A silver lining

Some of the people who read my blog has commented that I am being bitchy and it was, in retrospect, a bit uncivilised dissing out your family members online, where everyone could see. I do agree with those thoughts, however, consider being in my position having to deal with these kind of irresponsible behaviour on almost a daily basis.

Imagine having bought gifts for your nephew (my 1st bro-in-law's son), and spent 2-3 hours joking around with him about him getting a new handphone from his dad for passing his PSLA. Imagine you joked with him about him secretly SMSing an imaginary girlfriend behind his authoritarian mother's back. Imagine the mom and dad (my 1st sis and bro-in-law) laughing along. Then, imagine your in-laws going behind your back after you have left and complaining to your mom-in-law that you were teaching their son bad things by joking about SMSing a girlfriend. How would you feel?

I have since sworn to my wife that I would never step my foot in his house unless I am invited as part of a family gathering. This is the same guy who asked me to come to his house while me and my wife were dating, only for him to give me a lecture about the perils of riding bikes and him telling me not to ride a bike whenI go out with his sister. Needless to say, I ignored him. I mean my mom and dad had nothing to say about me riding, heck, they even bought me my first bike!!

I have never really felt as part of my in-laws' family. To them, I will always be an outsider. I spoke out against transferring the house my MIL and FIL lives in to my 2nd BIL. No one listened. Now, he is in a financial mess and my MIL and FIL can't have peace of mind. My 73 yr old FIL has to work as a security guard to make ends meet now. I have been telling my parents-in-law to stay with me and let my 2nd BIL settle their financial issues but they refused. Now, my 2nd BIL is pissed with my wife for telling me everything that goes on. Last I checked, we are still married and she is my responsibility as much as I am hers.

The only silver lining is my wife. I still call her gutless for not standing up to her brothers but I understand that her refusal to standup to them is for the sake of her mother. She is a model daughter. She'd rather be in pain that see her mom suffer. So being the good daughter she is, she supports her mom financially when her brothers don't or won't. In fact, for a long while, she was a better daughter than she was a wife. Rather than let the whole thing boil over, she kept the issues to herself and, basically, let it tear her to shreds. This in turn, almost destroyed our marriage. She became very agitated at every little thing and caused a lot of friction in our relationship.

It was a good thing we managed to work things out tho. A buddy of mine said we make a great team, I think so too. That's why I fought tooth and nail to salvage my marriage. Thankfully, she realised her mistakes.She knows now what was the impact of her brothers actions, or inactions, had on everyone and not to hide things away from me especially if it concerns us.

Honestly, things are not getting any better, but I'll just see what happens next. I'll probably walk out of the family with my wife and leave them to themselves. If my mum and dad-in-law wants to join me and my wife, they are welcome. Just dun bring the damn extended family.